Chapter 319 – Volume 64 – I Don’t Want You to Be Happy (4)
“Ha…”
As I plunged myself into the warm water, I sighed involuntarily.
As soon as I realized that I wasn’t related by blood to my brother.
I couldn’t resist the urge and ran out of the house, heading straight to the villa where my brother was staying.
When I think about it, I heard that my brother and sister Rosaria have been staying here for a long time.
So, you can still feel that natural even after having a child.
…If only I hadn’t run away from my brother when I was younger.
Could it be possible for me to stay here too?
It’s not that I don’t know that my brother is having a hard time.
Would it have been possible to stay by his side and take advantage of the opportunity like Rosaria did?
Those regrets come rushing in, and you end up feeling bad for no reason.
If you already regret them, you can’t turn them back.
So, I need to be by my brother’s side even now.
You must have made that determination as you came this far.
“…Am I really such an idiot?”
But when I stand in front of my brother, any resolve crumbles.
I can’t control my emotions, and I end up saying things I don’t even mean to say.
So I threw away the opportunity I had once again found.
…That was the car I thought it would be.
“The real idiots were my older brother and older sister…”
Even though I said such harsh things and got irritated.
I didn’t understand why they accepted me even though they said it was okay.
I don’t know why they treat someone like me like that.
“…No, I’ve never had an older brother like you.”
‘Ugh…’
That’s what I’m thinking.
The words I said earlier come to mind.
Because my brother threw out hurtful words.
…I didn’t particularly mean to be angry at my brother.
Rather, I hate that fact that it became the cause of my brother and I being separated.
I think it’s fortunate that there is no blood between my brother and me.
“He’s my younger brother…”
I feel bitter.
In my brother’s eyes, I guess I am that kind of person.
But does my brother really know that I cannot be satisfied with that position?
Being a younger sister is definitely a position where you can be by your brother’s side for a long time.
But ultimately, that too has its limits.
If you want to stay by your brother’s side longer, you need to go a little further.
Rather, at that point, their status as siblings is just a shackle.
So after I found out the truth, I definitely had that feeling on my mind.
It must have been thrown out with words like that before you knew it.
“Okay, just check that and then go back.”
There is a possibility that my brother and artist Siwoo are the same person.
From the moment I recognized that possibility and realized that my brother and I were not related by blood.
Depending on the truth, my future actions will vary.
Because you behaved badly towards your brother?
What shame do I have for approaching you?
…Such trivial things become less important.
‘This is like a matter of survival.’
The last few years have been nothing short of a blessing for me.
The cartoon drawn by artist Siwoo gave me new possibilities.
Because it was the hope of my broken heart.
You can love someone even if they are not your brother.
Maybe I can fill my empty heart.
Because I witnessed that possibility.
‘But, if my brother is a Siwoo painter…’
That means there was no such possibility.
I was just happy to feel the warmth of my brother’s touch again.
Because no possibility arose.
For me, the fact that there was no blood between my brother and me was perhaps salvation.
Now that I understand why my brother did what he did, the reason to be angry disappears.
Even if I were to remain next to my brother, there would be no problem.
“…”
Because I realized this once again as I clung to new hope in the past few years.
…I can’t live without my brother.
Outside of his love, I hated living a meaningless life because I couldn’t die.
Even if this greed torments my brother and ruins him.
Because I’ve always been that kind of bitch, a trashy bitch who doesn’t have the slightest conscience.
I will hit this greed and my love against you with all my might.
“Have you washed everything?”
“…Huh”
“I’ll leave my clothes here. I’m sorry these are the only ones that fit.”
“Are you okay.”
It was a style of clothing I had never seen before.
It felt like a lump of cloth rather than clothes.
There seemed to be a lot of things tied together.
“Oh, you don’t know how to put it on. Let me help you put it on.”
“Yes?”
I was definitely embarrassed because I didn’t know how to wear this.
Why does my sister do the work that nannies and servants would do?
…No, rather than that, it seems like the eyes are expecting something.
“Now, wait a minute.”
“Just be quiet.”
“Huh, sister?”
“Ha, I heard the fit wasn’t great because of the breasts.”
“Kyaaa!?”
Before I knew it, my sister had finished dressing me.
She started by tying a ribbon around her waist to finish it off.
…This is a pretty familiar feeling.
“Is it something like a corset?”
“That’s the way it is. Are you frustrated?”
“Not really…”
Because my nanny tended to pull harder.
Of course, these days, with the introduction of bras, I feel like I don’t wear corsets as often.
However, this does not mean that it is not used at all, so it is in a state of familiarity.
“Isn’t it pretty?”
Rosaria said, pointing towards the mirror.
She looked at me without thinking and saw me looking strangely awkward and embarrassed.
…It’s a design that kind of suits me.
“I understand that it is a traditional costume often worn by the beast people.”
“It’s my first time wearing clothes like this.”
“I originally bought it for myself to wear, but the size didn’t fit.”
“…Ah.”
I wonder if this outfit took into account the fact that the chest area is quite large.
The cloth area of that part was set to be quite large.
Of course, it’s a style of clothing that doesn’t feel baggy even if you have small breasts…
“I could wear it, but it didn’t fit properly.”
“Aha…”
“So I was neglecting it. I wanted to take this opportunity to give it to Rika.”
“You’re giving it to me? Are you really okay?”
“Because I don’t wear it anyway.”
I slowly started looking in the mirror again.
Maybe it was because I was in a hurry to put it on after just washing it, but my clothes were slightly damp.
I really liked how it blended in well with my unique hair color.
“Sister, why are you treating me so kindly?”
“Huh?”
“I always say harsh things to my brother and sister…”
“Because I understand.”
“Uh?”
“Because I know very well how you must have felt.”
My sister said that.
I stared at the window where the sunlight was pouring in.
…What on earth do you know?
“You know, Kali hasn’t given up on swordsmanship for a really long time.”
“…It did.”
“And I was forced to be next to Carly, but I couldn’t say I was actually there.”
I stay by his side because I like him.
Because he wants to, he stays by his side.
I couldn’t express my honest feelings because I was embarrassed, but I wanted to be by his side at least that much.
“But Carly didn’t look at me at all.”
Because I know that my body is next to me, but my mind is far away.
It was so lonely.
“…I see.”
“It’s very recent. Carly put everything aside.”
“Ah.”
I heard he had a huge fight with his father back then.
And for being by his brother’s side for such a long time.
I guess Rosaria is next to her brother now.
“So, if Rika wants, I will do my best to help her.”
“Help?”
In the end, what I want is my brother.
To put it the other way around, it could also mean taking Rosaria’s brother away from her.
Even now, my older brother and older sister have a child…
“Ah, I understand what you’re worried about.”
“To?”
“That’s okay. I have no intention of monopolizing Kali.”
I think it’s different.
What you are talking about is only a matter of time.
If only I recognized this deep, dark feeling that makes me want to be more entangled with my brother…
“It’s all like that. I want to have a child with the person I like. I also want to do dirty things.”
“Uh, huh!?”
“Oh, did I go too far? You didn’t feel that way?”
“Oh, no, I mean…”
What on earth is this sister talking about?
Her head became dizzy as she wondered if she had heard correctly.
…Are you saying it’s okay for me to ask my brother for something like that?
“Of course it’s okay.”
“Why…?”
“Because I can’t stop it. In the end, if I were you, I would have rushed forward without paying attention to myself.”
In that case, let’s just get along well.
Let’s unite as people who like the same things.
…Honestly, it was a strange logic, but perhaps that was my sister’s consideration and warmth.
“So, what do you want to know?”
“Uh…?”
“Aside from what I said earlier, is there anything else you’re curious about?”
“…”
When I came out of the bathroom earlier.
She says she was seen strangely looking around the house in detail.
So she wondered if there was still something she was curious about.
“Sister.”
“Huh.”
“…By any chance, is your brother a painter?”
I don’t know why I said it.
The fear of hiding the evidence by saying something for no reason arose late on.
When I saw Rosaria looking at me with warm eyes, my heart began to calm down.
“Wait a minute.”
My sister said that.
Suddenly she went out of the room and came back in with a bunch of her stuff.
…Is this paper with various scribbles drawn on it?
“Do you want to take a look?”
“…This.”
A familiar painting style catches my eye.
This is my first time seeing work that was just a simple sketch.
Nevertheless, you can immediately tell that the person who painted this is ‘Artist Siwoo.’
“Look at the contents carefully.”
“Detail…?”
Of course, it wasn’t a proper cartoon.
There were various similar plans listed.
I read them slowly.
“No way, these contents…”
“Did you get the answer?”
This familiar adventure story.
People I know strangely well.
…This was definitely a story my older brother told me when I was young.
