Chapter 33
The next day's class felt long. I wished it would end sooner, but the time ticked by as usual.
How many times did I check my watch? Each time I checked my watch, I felt depressed that I had only gone five minutes too fast or not fast enough.
Seeing me like this, Ichika asked me during gym class, “What's wrong with you?” She asked me, “What's going on?
As I lined up behind my friend for short-distance running practice, I put my hand to my chin and stared into the air as I thought about what I should say.
I wondered if it would be okay to just say it, since it was Ichika. I came to the conclusion that it would be okay if I just said it since it was Ichika, and without mentioning Toramasa's name, I whispered “I'm staying over today” with my face still relaxed.
Ichika rolls her eyes a bit, but soon her expression returns and she asks in a whisper, “We're not really going out, are we?” I asked her in a whisper, “We're not dating, are we?
I'm not going out with you.
I don't know what kind of relationship you two have, so I'm not sure how to react.
I'm sorry for making you feel lost. I'm sorry for making you confused, but I'd be happy if you'd tell me you're happy for me.
I'm happy for you.
Thank you!
I was so overjoyed that I raised my hand to Ichika, who replied exactly what I had said.
After finishing the run, I breathe lightly on my shoulder and open my mouth again as I walk back to the starting point alongside Ichika.
This time the topic is not about Toraga, but about the TV show we watched yesterday.
Was it unnatural to divert the topic away from Toraga?
But I don't know how much I should tell Ichika, and it would embarrass her, so I try to keep my voice as upbeat as possible.
Ichika took me up on the topic without saying a word. Perhaps she didn't care that much that I changed the subject.
We continued to talk about nothing else until the end of gym class.
I smiled at the topic of conversation as it changed.
When school was over, I rushed out of the classroom.
I had told Ichika in advance that we would not be going home together today, so I ran toward the front door at once.
I ran down the stairs, holding onto the railing, and when I reached the first floor, I saw that some of the third graders had finished their classes and were heading for the shoe boxes.
I glanced down the third grade hallway and my eyes caught the tall figure with one stunning glance.
Partly because there were no people around Toramasa, but also because my eyes met Toramasa's even for a split second as we ran past, and that alone made me happy.
I was happy just because of that. I would have him all to myself.
Thinking of this, my legs naturally moved faster. I ran, ignoring the temperature, which remained hot even in September, and after returning home, I took a quick shower, changed into my clothes, picked up the bag I had prepared yesterday, and headed for the supermarket near Toramasa's house.
This is the same supermarket where I had visited for Toraya's birthday, and I couldn't help but think back to that time as I looked at the items on the shelves.
Come to think of it, that was the last time I stayed at Toramasa's house. I thought to myself, “I've been to Toraya's house many times.
I had been to Toraya's house many times. But I haven't stayed at Toraya's house since my birthday.
I had been to Toraya's house so many times that I felt as if I had stayed there after my birthday, but when I think back, that was not the case.
I was so happy and excited just to see him, but I wondered what he thought about it. I wondered how he felt about it.
If Toraya had not asked me to stay after thinking about it over and over, I would have been very happy to see him.
Thinking about this, I stopped moving with the product in my hand.
However, he immediately shook his head, moved his body and put the items in his hands in the basket.
If that was the case, Toraga would have told me properly …….
If it really was no good, he would have given me a good reason and shaken his head when I said I wanted to stay.
I have seen what kind of person Toraya is in the past few months.
I think I know him better than I did before. …… I think I know him better than anyone else. I like to think I do.
I think I know Toraya that only I know, Toraya that others don't know.
— I'm not sure I know what I'm talking about.
I was walking to Toramasa's house, carrying a heavy supermarket bag in both hands, when the apartment where Toramasa lives came into view.
–As I was walking toward the apartment, I saw a man in black running toward me from the direction of the apartment.
My heart was racing as he ran straight to me.
Did he see me through the window? Did he come all the way outside?
I almost cried when I thought of …… that.
When Toraga came to me, he gently patted my head and said, “I'll hold the rest,” then took the supermarket bag from my hand, looked around a little, and walked alongside me.
I offered to carry one of the bags, but he softly refused, and I felt a mixture of apology and happiness.
Biting back such happiness, I slung my own bag back on my shoulder and walked with Toramasa all the way to the apartment.
It's so hot.
I turned on the air conditioner in the room.
As we arrived at the apartment, I headed straight for the kitchen with Toramasa.
I put the ingredients I was going to use today and the ingredients I was going to cook for lunch tomorrow in the fridge, and after watching Toramasa put away tomorrow's ingredients in the fridge, I took out the apron from my bag and put it on.
It's kind of like living together. ……
Would Toramasa be annoyed if I said that?
I don't say it out loud, I keep it to myself and turn my itching body and mind into a fever for preparing dinner.
Since I had a Western-style meal the other night, I decided to have a Japanese-style meal today, so I washed the rice and then cut up the ingredients I had bought.
The rice is a little hard because Toramasa said he liked it the other day, and the miso soup is my favorite, but it's tofu and nameko mushrooms. This is my favorite combination for miso soup.
I also had the classic meat and potatoes and spinach with sesame paste. Then there is cabbage with salted kelp, which I had a craving for today. It's easy to make yet delicious, so I sometimes make it as a small snack.
Like last time, it is not a fancy or elaborate meal. Still, I make what I am used to making many times and what I am confident that I won't fail.
I hope they say it tastes good again. I heard the sound of the rice cooking and looked at my cell phone clock, thinking, “It's past 5:30….
It's past 5:30….
I made it so that I could eat it anytime, but I wonder what time Toramasa wants to eat it?
I turned around to look at Toramasa who was probably sitting on the sofa, but Toramasa was not on the sofa. To my surprise, Toraya was sitting in a nearby dining chair, resting his elbows on the table and watching me.
When in the world did he start ……. Even though I was engrossed in making dinner, I didn't notice the sound of the chair being pulled out and didn't recognize him even though he was so close.
“I stuttered ……. How long have you been here?”
I don't know. I don't know how long I've been here.
What's that?”
I was so happy to see him, I couldn't help but smile as I answered him.
What time do you want to eat?
If it's ready, I want to eat already.
Toramasa gets up from his chair and prepares a plate and a bowl.
My bowl is a spare bowl. My bowl is a spare bowl, and my chopsticks are a splittable chopstick.
It's the same as before, but it feels strange and bothers me a little. However, it is only a little bit bothersome. I don't want to say it out loud.
I put the dishes on the dining table.
Itadakimasu. I was the first to reach for the miso soup.
I let it cool down a little, but it was still hot, so I drank it little by little while letting it cool down with my breath.
When I looked at Toramasa, he was the first to put his hand on the meat and potatoes.
My heart was sadly tightened when I saw Toramasa eating the rice I had prepared for him.
I am so happy to have the person I love eat my rice, to be able to eat together.
I unintentionally stop drinking the miso soup and stare at Toramasa's figure.
I never get tired of looking at Toramasa's beautiful face no matter how many times I see it. I love his hair, his hands, his body, his voice, his nails, everything. I love it all.
I love her just for her looks, but when she smiles at me and touches me with her kindness and care, I can't stop loving her.
The way he holds his chopsticks, the way he puts food in his mouth, the way his lips hold the food. All of them steal my gaze.
I had been so happy and moved by his eating that I was overflowing with love for him, but this time, the sight of him eating this new food was so sexual that it made my face heat up.
Toramasa, perhaps noticing my gaze, turned his gaze to me and lifted the corner of his mouth and said, “It's delicious.
He probably thought I was waiting for him to tell me what he thought of the food.
I was glad he didn't find out about my strange thoughts. Even as I thought about this, Toramasa's words warmed my heart, and my cheeks naturally rose as I replied, “Thank you very much.
I resumed eating again, and then proceeded to eat, looking at Toramasa from time to time.
I then proceeded to eat, looking at Toramasa from time to time.
Toramasa's words almost made me blow out my rice.
I was upset when he suddenly brought up the subject.
Recently, it has become a trend among us to take photos based on the concept of casual everyday life. ……
“Oh, I thought there were a lot of interesting pictures on the street.”
“Oh, wait, what kind of pictures did you send me?
“……, posing like a band with cleaning supplies and stuff.”
What?
Gymnastics.
“What…?”
“or doing weird poses with Hanamiya.”
What?
Perhaps that was the last one. The last one is probably the one where they took a picture when they were in a weird mood like, “Let's all do cool poses together! It's a picture taken in a weird mood like “Let's all strike a cool pose!
Wait, you sent that picture? I think it was probably Mr. Hanamiya who sent it, but of all people, a picture like that!
No decent pictures? !”
I wonder.”
“Wow, I'm so embarrassed, if there was a hole, I'd want to go in it ……”
I'm glad to know how you spend your time, though.
I don't do that all the time! It's just a random photo!
“Oh, really?”
The actuality that you can find a lot more than one of the most popular types of shoes and boots is that you can find a lot more than one of the most popular types of shoes and boots. In fact, you could say that I've only been acting weird.
It's not wrong… it's not wrong, but …… even though I know it's too late, I want Toramasa to think I'm a more decent woman… or …… what can I say? ……It's too late for that, but …….
I was too embarrassed to look at Toramasa's face, and all I could do was eat the meal that was in front of me.
When I finished eating and was carrying the dishes to the sink, Toramasa said, “I'll do the washing up,” and stood at the sink while carrying his own dishes.
I said I would do it, but Toramasa refused to let go of the sponge and would not bend to his will, so I gave in and stood next to him watching him.
I stood next to him and watched him wash the dishes with the foaming sponge, and then, unable to stay still, I picked up the foaming dishes and washed them with water.
Why are you doing it too?
It would be faster if we did it together.”
The last of the dishes was taken from Toramasa's hand and washed away one by one.
The last of the dishes was taken from Toramasa's hand, and when he had finished washing off the foam, he turned off the water, wiped his hands on the towel, and looked at Toramasa standing next to him.
He then turned off the water, wiped his hands on the towel, and looked at Toramasa, who was standing next to him.
Toramasa gave me a troubled smile and said, “Yes, I guess so,” putting his hand on my shoulder as we both headed for the sofa.
As we sit down on the sofa, Toraga's hand leaves my shoulder and reaches for the TV remote control.
As I looked at his hand, feeling lonely, Toramasa's hand reached out to me again, and this time he held my hand.
My heart skips a beat, and at the same time, I feel warm to the core.
Toraga's hand on top of mine is large and stumpy, darker and tanner than my skin, and a little warmer than mine.
I turned my palm upward so that it overlapped with Toraya's palm and squeezed his hand back with my fingertips.
I felt a deep feeling of love welling up from deep within me.
I almost cry because I love him so much.
When I turned my gaze from my hand to Toraga's, he was looking at me.
Maybe it looks that way because I'm about to cry myself. But the wrinkled face between his eyebrows looked somewhat like he was about to cry, and I squeezed the hand I was holding even tighter.
I like Toraga's hand very much.
I was so happy to see him again.
I continue to say again, “Because they are big, manly, gentle and …… touch me.”
I'm not sure what to say, but I'm sure I'll be able to find a way. But the hand is the one that touches me the most …….
He holds my hand, touches my shoulder, pats my head, touches my cheek. All of them touch me with Toraga's will and Toraga's thoughts.
After I said it, I felt embarrassed and turned my gaze from Toramasa to the TV, when I heard him say, “Me too,” and I turned my gaze back to Toramasa again.
Toraga had the same expression on his face as before, and his shapely lips moved gently.
I like your hands.”
My heart beat loudly as the word like came out of Toramasa's mouth.
My heart pounded and beat painfully fast.
I was surprised to hear him say, “Thank you,” his voice trembling so much that I could hear it myself.
I love Toraga again today more than I did yesterday.
And I am more selfish than I was yesterday.
I want to touch Toraga more, I want to be close to him, I want to hear his voice, I want to have his eyes all to myself.
I want him to tell me I'm cute more and more, to tell me he likes my hands or whatever. I want to know what Toramasa thinks of me, whatever it is.
But I won't tell Toraga because that's my only feeling and I just want it.
—-
After spending some time together watching TV, I saw Toramasa playing with his cell phone, and remembering our conversation while we were eating dinner, I asked Toramasa, without hesitation, “Can I see what kind of pictures you sent me?” I asked Toramasa, “Can I see what kind of pictures you sent me?
Toramasa thought for a moment and handed me the cell phone he was holding in his hand, saying, “Here you go.
I was surprised, but fearful, as I had not expected him to hand me the phone as it was, and bowed repeatedly.
I was surprised that he would give me the phone as it was, but I was afraid to accept it and bowed to him several times.
I opened the folder of photos with this thought in mind.
'…… there's quite a lot of them.
I got a huge amount of them.
I'm sorry about that. ……
I don't really care.”
The two of us looked at our cell phones and looked at the photos in order starting with the first one on the rooftop.
I am embarrassed …… to look at my own photos. I'm sorry, though Toraga is saying, “It's too soon. I don't like to look at my own face too much. ……
What was sent to Toraga was just a small part of the many photos I took over the course of a few days. Only the pictures with me in them.
The photos were no worse than what Toraga said they were.
Thank God, I didn't send any photos of me fooling around with quicksand.
Hanamiya-san and Endo-senpai also seemed to have thought a lot about what they were sending, and there were no photos that were weirder than I had expected.
There were a few pictures of Hanamiya-san and Endo-senpai smiling happily, and I was looking at them with a smile on my face.
The photos, which I had thought were voluminous, were over in a flash.
The last photo was a profile of me standing on the balcony.
Perhaps this photo is from my daily Toraga watch every morning. The smile on my face means it was either when I found Toraga or …….
I had thought about requesting the deletion of the photo if it was too strange, but it seemed to be okay.
I was relieved and handed the phone to Toraya, saying, “Thank you very much.
What's your routine?”
Heh?”
I was surprised to hear him say it out loud.
I didn't blink and looked at Toraga, and he opened his mouth again as he looked at the picture.
'When Reika sent this to me, she said it was your routine.
'Oh, Reika said that!
Oh.”
What a thing to say, Endo-senpai. ……
I open my mouth to say something in a hurry, but the words don't come out and my mouth closes again. The actual “I'm not a fan of the newest and most popular of the newest and most popular of the newest, but I'm not a fan of the newest and most popular of the newest.
I exhaled a small breath and hid my face, which was probably red, with my hands.
I probably won't.”
The first time I saw him, I was so embarrassed and uncomfortable that I looked at his neck and opened my mouth.
I'm looking for Toraga's figure in the morning. ……
The last part of the words became so small that they disappeared.
And as I said it, I glanced at Toraga's unanswered face, regretting that I should have misled him, and he looked at me with a surprised expression on his face.
I knew I had pulled it off. …… I was about to open my mouth to say, “I'm sorry,” when Toraya opened his mouth.
When did it start?
'Since …… April. ……
When I answered the question honestly, Toraga hid his face with one hand and muttered, “That's what you mean.
I didn't understand what he meant by that. but Toramasa did not reply.
But right after that. I was so shocked that I did not care that I did not receive a reply.
I saw Toraga in front of me, covering his face with one hand.
I was so shocked that I didn't care that I didn't get a reply.
“What? ……?”
I couldn't help but let out a voice.
Perhaps in response to my voice, Toraya's hand, which had been covering his eyes, shifted to his mouth.
The eyes of Torayaga, which had been hidden, were looking down.
I thought I was looking at the wrong thing, but Torayaga's cheeks were still stained red, and I let out another dumb “What?
Because, what, why is Toraga's face red?
A heat as if my whole body was erupting with sweat, and as if following Toraga's lead, my own face also became hot.
I can't believe the scene before me, but no matter how many times I blink, Toraga's face is still red, he doesn't say anything, we don't make eye contact, and I'm already feeling like my face is burning from the heat. ……
I wonder how long it took for the air to become somewhat still, even though I could hear the TV.
I'm going to …… go to the convenience store.”
Oh, yes.
The first thing to do is to make sure that you have a good time.
The actual “I'm not a fan of the way you look at it, but I'm not a fan of the way you look at it either.
I held my hot cheeks with the back of my hand as I asked myself a lot of questions.
No one would answer my soliloquy.
I repeated the endless questions to myself in my brain.
The heat on my face showed no sign of subsiding, and I could do nothing but wait for Toramasa to return.
