Chapter 86 – NTO
I wanted to be a hero.
I wanted to become a righteous being who protects people.
But what am I doing now?
Natsuo clenched his fists tightly. Scary. She was just standing in front of the door and her whole body was stiff and tense. Was it like this in the first battle?
······Now that the battle is over.
Natsuo visited Netoru’s hospital room.
Due to the fierce battle between the bugs and the holy cavalry, it was difficult to find a building in good shape in the city, but fortunately, the hospital where Natsuo and other members of Unit 393 were staying was generally in good condition.
As a result, many of the wounded and members of the unit were currently hospitalized.
Natsuo took a deep breath and squeezed the doorknob. Maybe there’s Karen in here. Hearing vaguely from his unit members, it seemed that he was always guarding the seat next to Toru.
“·······”
Before opening the door, Natsuo thought back to the last time he saw Karen’s face.
The time when he was supporting the blond man and climbing the sexual cavalry.
I had never seen her black eyes so cold. It wasn’t just an eye blaming Natsuo.
More emotions than that… It’s something
Just thinking about it makes me shudder. It would be better if they scolded me there, if they got angry… It would have been nice.
For the past month.
Did that man become so precious? So me… To the point of resentment, is that man good?
Of course Natsuo knows. That this is her own fault. She regrets it so much. I am sincerely sorry. She is grateful that the man saved her.
But why?
The thought of Karen and the man made her heart throb.
—-Okay. I will believe
Karen’s voice I’ve never heard before. Emotion. Trust.
Natsuo, what he wanted to hear so much… Her words.
What he had been longing for for the past three years, he had obtained in just one month. Why is that? Is it because the man’s skills are so great?
…Anything is fine
There was only one thing Natsuo had to do here. To apologize to Karen and Netoru.
‘… Karen.’
Natsuo didn’t want to be looked at like that by Karen. She always wanted to be someone she could count on and have her back. As a man, he wanted to stand proudly by her side.
In fact, in a way he wants to be a hero, even a wish.
It could all be attributed to Karen.
That way, she will look after me.
Because she wanted someone like that.
Recalling her story, which we talked about at the institution.
Natsuo mustered up the courage to open the door.
Then, as expected, Karen was inside. She stood by the window where the raindrops dripped, just quietly staring at her man named Netoru.
Serene atmosphere. But what you can feel there is something heartbreaking and heartbreaking.
Watching that makes my heart throb again.
It would have been better if it had been me lying there right now. Even thinking about that for a moment, Natsuo put on a confused expression.
How many seconds did he stare at Karen’s back?
Finally, Karen slowly began to look behind her.
“·······”
“·······”
Our eyes met. A dry silence lingered between the two. Karen just stared at her quietly, and Natsuo turned her head away, unable to catch his gaze.
An awkward atmosphere that I have never experienced before.
It was a long relationship that started from the institution. So, it wasn’t that there wasn’t a fight. However, it was the first time I felt awkward as if the air would freeze.
Eventually, Karen opened her mouth first.
“···I’m here?”
“Ah···. Huh.”
Is it good to say that this is fortunate? Karen looked away with a short word. Natsuo stood behind her with her restless face.
Like that, I stare endlessly at Karen’s back, who is sitting in her chair, as if she’s guarding Toru’s side.
Karen continues to say nothing. She may have no intention of talking at all.
Such an atmosphere… I hate it too
I’m short of breath My heart ached and I thought I would die.
The feeling of being a complete third party and being ostracized.
Not anyone else… Why is Karen treating me like this? Why, to the girl you like?
What should I say… My head is dizzy.
So Natsuo’s only words were apologies. She’s here because she came to do this.
“… Karen. Sorry.”
“I’m sorry?”
“Huh. Therefore···. Today’s work is really… “
“Natsuo.”
She stopped talking. I felt the air around me freeze at the sound of Karen’s cold voice. Natsuo gasped and swallowed her breath.
At that moment, Karen muttered in a low voice.
“If you are going to apologize, do it to Netoru, not me. Because of you, this person has become like this.”
“···Ah.”
Natsuo, who nodded at her involuntarily, opened her mouth slightly and looked at her man lying on her sick bed.
Brown skin that looks like it has been sunburned for a long time, and blonde hair with a dull feeling… He was a man with sharp features and sharp eyes, as well as a cold impression.
This was the first time I had seen it properly. Karen’s coupling partner, whom she had only vaguely heard about.
And the man who replaced me for a month.
…And the man Karen gave her faith to.
“I’m really disappointed in you today.”
Saying that, Karen reached out her hand. Before long, her hand touched the blond man’s hair.
My heart throbs again at the sight of him gently stroking the man’s hair. Natsuo was trying hard to deny her own pain. No, I had to.
“Natsuo. Let me ask you one thing. At that time, why didn’t you go to the shelter and just hang around on top of the clock tower?”
“···That.”
Natsuo licked his lips. What should I say here? What should I say to her…
No, I can’t say
He was curious about a man named Netoru, so he climbed the top of the clock tower.
There, he was overwhelmed by his battle and watched endlessly…
How can I honestly tell Karen all this?
But.
“Natsuo. Tell me.”
As if he had no intention of giving him a corner to escape to.
Karen turned her head again to stare at her.
It was a dull black eye. Neither cold nor warm Now, rather than scolding, she was asking questions out of pure curiosity.
“Why were you there?”
“That is···. Therefore···.”
I feel like my mind is going crazy. Natsuo trembled in her voice. The more she looked into Karen’s eyes, the more fear gnawed at her mind.
A heavy pressure weighed down her entire body.
Originally, she tried to be honest. And she was going to ask for forgiveness. She confided in Karen and tried to apologize sincerely.
······But if this is the case. You can’t do it.
Natsuo was afraid. If I were to be honest like this, what kind of gaze would Karen send?
So, he had no choice but to lie.
“There were people.”
“Person?”
“That, yes… Person! So I helped them and sent them to a shelter… Somehow I got caught by a bug and stopped…”
“·······”
Karen was still staring at Natsuo’s face. It was a cold look, as if trying to find out if it was a lie or the truth.
Finally, Karen narrowed her eyes slightly and asked.
“…Is that for real?”
“Now···. Are you saying you don’t believe me?”
At Karen’s question, Natsuo immediately burst into tears.
Why can’t Karen believe me?
When was the last time I cheated on her.
From the institution, Natsuo has always been honest with Karen.
She never lied to her.
…At least except for now.
“Karen, you saw how I became dangerous to centipedes while saving people! It’s just that the same thing happened. Trust me because it’s true…”
“·······”
Nervous Karen doesn’t respond.
Natsuo said to her, shaking her neck.
“Karen… When have I ever lied…? You know very well. That I never lied to you.”
“…Certainly never before.”
“···To?”
Until now···?
She hadn’t even realized the meaning of those words. A faint smile appeared on Karen’s face.
“Really···. Hate.”
What should it be
It was a sad smile, as if she was about to cry.
The cold black eyes were watery.
“Natsuo… Do you know what expression you’re making right now?”
“…My face?”
At Karen’s words, Natsuo touched his face with her hand. But even so, she couldn’t tell what kind of expression she was making.
So, as if to give the answer, Karen said.
“You···. You’re making a very ugly face right now. Really, cowardly, despicable… A face that the Natsuo I knew would never do.”
“… Karen.”
“…To be honest, I was very angry with you today. But first, I wanted to hear what you had to say. No matter what, there is a relationship between you and me. Maybe I’m misunderstanding you.”
“… Karen.”
Karen. Please don’t talk more
Please please
But.
“By the way···.”
As if Karen saw through her clumsy lies at once,
With tears welling up in her reddened eyes, she told Natsuo.
“…Not to anyone else, and you can’t lie to me.”
At that moment, Natsuo felt something inside him shatter.
