Chapter 1263 – 1263. Yggdrasil (8)
I went into Chimmong and saw dark scenes several times.
Still, the reason why I was surprised when I saw Erdin’s dream was…
‘Wow… It feels like some kind of afterlife?’
If other places were just dark scenes, the place I was in now had a cool feeling.
A dark space that gives you a bone-chilling feeling.
In the middle of that dark space, Erdin was sitting as if he was dying.
No, to be more precise…
‘… ‘You’re alive, right?’
The correct answer would be that we do not know whether he is dead or alive.
Dying in a dream doesn’t mean you die in real life, but it also doesn’t mean it’s okay to face the dead state.
Originally, I was planning to watch a natural dream, but…
‘Let’s start with the operation.’
Wanting to get out of this situation, I tried dream manipulation.
Fortunately, the operation itself was done well.
If you have a problem…
‘I can’t do much.’
Perhaps because Erdin’s magic power was high, my mana was being sucked out.
The dream that created my mana as a sacrifice was…
‘Now, let’s see what you think of me.’
It was to confirm the evaluation of myself.
It is impossible to see her past because it is sealed anyway.
I decided to find out any other questions I had after checking the evaluation.
The dark environment quickly turned into a guest room, and Erdin and I sat across from each other at the guest room table.
Erdin’s corpse-like eyes began to sparkle, albeit slightly, with life.
“Hmm…”
But the dazed appearance itself did not change.
It was as if she was resisting due to her anti-magic power.
‘Let’s write more.’
I used a little more mana in order to prevent a situation where I was perceived as Stella.
Let’s use it like that…
“Hmm… ?”
Erdin’s expression became bright, and he looked puzzled.
“What is it? “What do you want to say?”
Erdin had no doubts about this situation, and she began to talk naturally.
I was relieved to see Erdin like that and answered with a gentle smile.
“What do you think of me?”
“I don’t like it.”
“Haha…”
The answer came immediately.
Actually, it was an answer I expected, so I wasn’t particularly hurt.
I asked Erdin for a more detailed answer.
“Tell me how you hate it.”
“I just don’t like it.”
“…”
I can’t see the answer.
The body’s rejection reaction could be solved by controlling chastity magic.
But what about mental rejection?
The fact that he says something like that even though he manipulated the dream means that he is tainted with hatred to the very depths.
‘What should I do? I don’t think it will be easy unless you use hypnosis or something.’
The worst way is to manipulate the chastity magic and attack it first.
Even Stella of the world collapsed in front of Son’s skills.
I thought that if I could just get my hands on it, I could somehow resolve the mental rejection.
If our relationship was bad, I would have subdued her like Stella a long time ago…
‘… I don’t like that.’
The problem was that I couldn’t possibly want to do that to my child.
‘Shall we find out something else first?’
The moment you feel like you’ve been screwed up from the start and think about a different way…
“I hate myself like that too.”
“Huh?”
Erdin said something unexpected.
“You don’t like it?”
“That’s literally it. I hate my feelings of hating you.”
Erdin then began to give her detailed description of her feelings.
“If the feeling of dislike persists, it keeps bothering me. And I hate situations where I get on my nerves like that. “I don’t like those sensations interfering with my research.”
“Hehe…”
It was like saying, “I don’t like it because I don’t like the fact that I don’t like it.”
It was unexpected.
You hate the feeling of hate…
But thanks to Erdin’s answer…
‘Good… It’s not like there’s no way.’
I was able to find hope.
I felt a strange feeling watching Erdin spew out similar words.
‘Because I can’t solve it myself, it feels like my instincts are asking me to do something to solve it.’
The sight of Erdin pouring out explanations to me felt exactly like that.
It feels like they treat me like a problem solver.
But that doesn’t mean…
‘I guess that’s how much I want to escape.’
It was a sincere wish that anyone would be able to rid themselves of their hatred.
I accepted Erdin’s reaction that way and calmed him down.
“Okay, I understand.”
“Whoa…” .”
Erdin slumped her shoulders with a relieved expression, as if her hidden anger had poured out on me.
Looking at Erdin like that, I tried to manipulate her dream again.
The place itself has not changed.
‘Let’s hide for now.’
The only thing that changed was that my appearance became transparent.
However, Erdin was not at all embarrassed by the disappearance of her image, and she suddenly began to move in unison.
He took out a piece of paper on the table and started scribbling like crazy.
‘… ‘What is it?’
I tilted her head as I looked at her alien language and patterns scribbled by Erdin.
These were patterns that I felt like I had seen before somewhere, but didn’t really pop into my head.
Fortunately, thanks to Erdin’s talking to himself, he was able to figure out the identity of the alien language and pattern.
“Ha… It was definitely like this. It appeared and disappeared in an instant… Furthermore, it was definitely this type of gin.”
It was the magic circle I used.
‘What? The magic circle I used? It’s not…’
But ironically, my magic circle wasn’t that messy alien language or pattern.
It was made up of very elaborate shapes and runes.
Nevertheless, it wasn’t long before I figured out why Erdin drew my magic circle in such a mess.
“It’s not a problem with my memory. Seeing how it looks different even when using the same magic… It is clear that it is delivered to the other party in a distorted form.”
It was because it really looked like that from Erdin’s perspective.
‘Aha… Even if you have learned magic, people who have not learned magic circles look like this.’
I didn’t know about the magic circle since I was learning it from the beginning, but after watching Erdin, I realized that the magic circle itself was in an encrypted form.
Thanks to this, I was able to learn an interesting fact.
And at the same time, I could understand why Erdin was tired.
“Ha… No… I can’t sleep at all…”
I couldn’t sleep because the image of my magic circle was blurry.
And I learned one more interesting fact.
“Let’s face off against Lucien. Maybe you can use magic in an emergency situation.”
I could see that the reason Erdin could sense the confrontation between me and Lucien was because of the magic circle.
Erdin stayed up without sleep for three days to find out the identity of my magic circle.
I admired and admired Erdin’s appearance like that.
‘Hey… His appearance and attitude are like a child… When you look like this, you don’t look like a child at all.’
If you think about it, he was a child who took on the position of captain at an age where he had not yet had a coming-of-age ceremony by elf standards.
To reach such a position at such a young age, there was a high possibility that he had talent and at the same time gave up something to get there.
‘When my memories come back later, let’s look into the past.’
I tried manipulating the dream again, hoping to resolve my curiosity about Erdin’s past in the future.
Erdin and I sat at the table like before and faced each other.
Erdin did not show any signs of surprise or discomfort at my sudden appearance.
I looked at Erdin and asked her the last question.
“What will you do if you meet the being chosen by Chastity Magic?”
“… “I don’t know.”
“… “What?”
It was an incomprehensible answer.
Since Erdin was currently in a dream, he was speaking out his inner thoughts without hesitation.
But the answer is that I don’t know…
Erdin went into further explanation as if his goal was to resolve my curiosity.
“Until yesterday, I would have waited until my memories returned and then followed the customs of the place I belonged to.”
“But now…”
“… “I don’t know.”
Values suddenly changed in one day.
I was able to vaguely understand why Erdin’s values had changed.
‘Is it because I lifted the chastity spell earlier?’
Other than that, there was no reason to suddenly change.
There was a high possibility that the mind that was firm before experiencing the removal of the chastity spell changed after experiencing it.
‘… It’s a good thing I unlocked it.’
This is how I found out all the information I could.
Now, there is only one goal left for me to achieve through sleep.
For that final goal…
‘Okay then, shall we begin?’
Dream manipulation was carried out.
***
“Hmm…”
Erdin opened her eyes to the sunlight and massaged her hands.
But what was held in Erdin’s hand was not the hand he was holding just moments ago…
“Uh… ?”
It was the blanket she was covering.
Erdin scratched the blanket, raised his upper body, and looked around her.
And she opened her mouth with a blank expression.
“… What is it?”
It was a situation that I could not understand.
Erdin was walking around her village holding a man’s hand just a moment ago.
But why is he suddenly, suddenly holding the blanket and even lying down?
It wasn’t until she nibbled on the blanket for about five minutes that Erdin realized her truth.
“Ah… It’s a dream…”
Erdin said she had never dreamed.
No, more accurately, most of her dreams were about being trapped in a dark space alone.
As a result, even in her dream, it took a long time for me to recognize it.
Erdin, who returned completely to reality, sighed with a bewildered expression.
“Ha… They say really crazy things happen in dreams… It’s true.”
Erdin had no memory of ever holding hands with a male elf.
But the first man I caught…
“There is no way I could hold hands with that man.”
The person I hate so much… Among them, she became Seongsu-ho.
Of course, since it was just a dream, she didn’t attach great significance to it.
But even though Erdin grumbled, she could not open her hand that was holding the blanket.
The reason she reacts like that is…
“… It’s strange. “I thought I would vomit if I caught it.”
Because what she experienced in her dream was very different from what she thought.
Erdin had always thought that if she held hands with a human man, her stomach would churn, and she would throw up.
This was because she had a strong hatred for humans.
But the hand of Seongsu-ho that she held in her dream…
“… Why is it okay?”
She wasn’t disgusted, she just wanted to catch it again.
However, if you have any doubts…
‘It didn’t feel like I was just holding hands. What can I say… I also felt like my stomach was getting better… I don’t know what it is.’
It felt like my lower abdomen was pounding.
I didn’t know before he lost his memory, but now Erdin didn’t know the identity of that pounding feeling in his lower abdomen.
It was an experience where I felt good but didn’t know why.
Erdin started stroking the blanket with one hand and his lower abdomen with the other hand.
Blanket and lower abdomen.
Everyone was freezing.
Erdin fretted like that for another 30 minutes…
“… Let’s get up first.”
I got out of bed, keeping my regrets inside the blanket.
.
.
Erdin got out of bed and searched for the cause of her dream for a while.
And the conclusion Erdin came to was simple.
“Maybe it’s because I didn’t sleep too much?”
The conclusion was that the problem was that he had not slept a wink for three days.
When Erdin came to that conclusion, he left the room with a sense of accomplishment.
And she felt accomplished and refreshed at the same time.
“Still, it’s good because I slept properly…”
She thought so and went down to the first floor.
A sense of accomplishment and refreshment.
It was to solve a problem that could not be solved with those two things.
That’s it…
Growling.
“I always think, it’s my body, why doesn’t it listen to me? .”
It was an empty stomach.
To satisfy my hunger, I went down to the first floor…
“Ah…”
Seong Su-ho sat down first and was eating.
As soon as Erdin saw Seong Su-ho, the scene she had seen in her dream began to unfold in her mind.
A dream of just holding hands and walking around the city.
He walked around the city holding hands with a man, a human man at that, and Seong Su-ho, who made fun of him all the time.
In the past, I would have trembled with disgust and spread my disgust everywhere.
But even as he ruminates on that dream, Erdin…
‘… Is touching it directly something else?’
She didn’t feel any disgust.
‘No, it’s completely different from yesterday. Yesterday it was hard to even see…’
However, it does not mean that all uncomfortable feelings have disappeared.
Some level of discomfort still remained.
But for Erdin, who always trembled with disgust, this level of discomfort…
‘Whoa… It’s comfortable, it’s comfortable.’
Rather, it made me feel comfortable.
In the first place, Erdin did not enjoy disgust.
It was just something my body and mind reacted to and I had no choice but to endure it.
While Erdin was enjoying some comfort, Seong Su-ho’s voice was heard from afar.
“Huh? What are you doing there?”
“Ah…”
Erdin, who came to his senses after hearing Seong Su-ho’s voice, hesitantly approached Seong Su-ho and answered.
“I came down for a meal.”
“Alone?”
“Yes.”
Seong Su-ho tapped the table and grinned at Erdin’s answer.
“Now that we’ve met, do you want to eat together?”
“…”
Originally, I would have shuddered and refused…
“… Yes, of course.”
Erdin accepted Seong Su-ho’s offer and sat across from him.
So let’s sit down and face Seong Su-ho…
‘What is it? It feels very familiar.’
She began to look at him blankly, feeling as if she was watching a scene she had already seen.
“Here. Here’s one more serving of what I’m eating…”
However, despite Erdin’s blank expression, Seong Su-ho was busy feeding him.
Just like that, the food for Erdin to eat arrived, and Erdin ate quietly.
He felt a little uncomfortable while eating in silence, but he never felt disgusted.
‘Have you gotten used to it since we meet so often? Then… Does this mean that things can get better if we keep meeting?’
Erdin missed the comfort he felt in his dreams.
It was still satisfying enough, but Erdin, who had experienced such a dream, hoped that reality would be as comfortable as the dream.
As the meal continued, Seong Su-ho’s voice knocked on Erdin’s mind.
“Did you hear me?”
“Ah… Sorry. “I didn’t hear it.”
“It’s okay, you’re still growing up, so if you’re hungry, you might not be able to hear because you’re too busy eating.”
“…”
Erdin bit his lip.
‘Comfortable is comfortable… I want to quickly learn the magic circle and give it a shot too.’
If it were yesterday, I would have thought of cutting off the relationship right away, but now, strangely, I didn’t feel like cutting off the relationship.
She asked through clenched teeth.
“Can you say that again?”
“Oh, it’s nothing special… I told you before. “I will decide whether to teach you the magic I know or not as we stay together.”
“That’s right.”
Erdin could feel the anticipation pouring in from Seong Su-ho’s words.
‘Are you trying to teach me now?’
But unfortunately, Erdin’s expectations were…
“But I didn’t feel like I could teach you if we only met occasionally like this, so I thought of something.”
“… ?”
“Let’s spend at least an hour or two a day just the two of us.”
“…”
It began to be washed away like a sand castle facing the sea.
Fortunately…
‘If I could learn knowledge just by matching my mood…’ It must be cheap. There… Maybe it’s because of the dream, but it’s not that hard…’
Erdin’s mood wasn’t that bad.
“Yes, I understand.”
“Oh… “I thought you would say no?”
“Whoa… What choice do I have…”
“Haha, good. Then let’s leave now.”
Seong Su-ho, who had just finished eating, stood up.
Erdin tilted her head as she looked at Seong Su-ho.
“Where are you going?”
“Let’s walk around the village together.”
“!?”
At Seong Su-ho’s words, Erdin suddenly remembered a scene he had seen in his dream.
Seongsu-ho and Erdin walked around the village together, holding hands.
‘It must be a coincidence, right?’
Erdin shook his head and stood up to shake off the vivid dream.
“Well, I wonder if there’s anything to see here… If you want, you should follow it.”
Erdin stood up and tried to follow Seongsu-ho, but Seongsu-ho did not move forward and just looked at Erdin blankly.
‘Why is this happening?’
Erdin looked up at him because he wanted to know something else.
Seong Su-ho looked at Erdin and stretched out his hand…
“Now, you might get lost, so hold my hand~”
“Profit…”
The disgust is gone.
However, the discomfort did not disappear.
It was hard to bear being treated like a child by someone younger than me.
But Erdin gritted his teeth…
‘Whoa… Be patient, be patient. ‘I have to learn.’
Thinking like that, he stretched out his hand.
An action I would have rejected without even thinking about it if it were yesterday.
Erdin continued that action very naturally.
Only after Erdin stretched out his hand did he realize that he had become a different being from yesterday.
‘Because of a dream… Is it?’
As she thought that and stood there with her hand outstretched, Seongsu-ho’s large hand wrapped around her hand.
When I first touched it, it just felt like my skin was touching it.
But when Seongsu-ho’s hand completely wrapped around her own hand, Erdin…
“… Huh?”
I could feel the pounding in her lower abdomen that I felt in her dream.
