How to Live With a Broken Saint 95

Chapter 95 – Gaze (2)

He thought that as long as he was guaranteed Shiana’s safety, he would be able to relax.

If Shiana’s existence were known to the mansion where many servants wandered around, Isabella would not be able to treat her carelessly.

Mason’s prediction was only half right.

It was good to get Ciana out of the stuffy, uncomfortable basement. Also, keeping her Isabella away from her Sianna was also an effect she had hoped for.

However, it was the gazes around her that troubled her more than she could have imagined.

Wherever he went in the mansion, people’s eyes followed Mason. Most of her pity, pity, and support for her gaze must have come from her warm heart, but it did not come as any consolation to her Mason.

Mason could only feel their gaze stifle him. The sympathy they sent was proof that no one in this mansion knew Isabella’s real face after all.

The warm support they gave and the good intentions of her implicit help came from ignorant good intentions, so they stabbed her even more sharply and painfully.

Mason had to work hard not to meet their eyes while pushing Cianna’s wheelchair. Slowly, his gaze was fixed on the back of Siana’s head.

But the more I tried not to care, the sharper and sharper their gaze felt,

Occasionally, Cianna will let out an incomprehensible scream, shake her body, and drop her head.

The gazes people sent were so thick and heavy that it seemed like it would take my breath away.

Mason didn’t want to be pitied.

She didn’t want to leave Siana alone as her poor child.

It was hateful to see them gossip among themselves, to blurt out the end of their words as if they were sorry, and to praise the good Isabella, who poured out her heart for her sick relative and helped her both physically and mentally, without knowing the truth.

No one wants to know why Cyana became this way.

Why Shiana was unconscious and why there are injection marks on her neck and arms.

He was really close, and no one bothered to dig into why he didn’t spend time with Isabella.

Of course, it was a feeling close to forced. Of course, digging into a person with a painful story is rude and disrespectful, so it was only natural that ordinary people would not approach him. Although it was just anger that she had lost her way to a situation that could not be resolved.

Even knowing that, Mason’s anger does not go away.

Cianna will never recover, and I will continue to hear that Isabella is a good person.

Currently, they may simply be seen as neighbors with a pitiful story, but in the future, the gaze toward the two may not be good.

“…”

Mason passed her down the aisle, holding the handle of her wheelchair silently with her trembling hands. The gazes and gossips of excessive servants were felt especially vividly.

Isabella turned her gaze from her papers to the door at the sound of a knock on her door.

“Come in.”

With her permission, the door opened, and Mason entered the room. Cianna pushed her wheelchair into the room.

Isabella smiled lightly.

“Good morning.”

Mason didn’t respond, which was what Isabella expected, so she got up with a good laugh.

As she tried to get past her desk and reach her siana, her mason stepped in and stopped her. But Isabella didn’t care, she went over and stroked her hair, she said.

“Did you sleep well, Siana?”

Naturally, she got no answer from Cianna. Her eyes, languid, were staring into space.

“Go there.”

Mason’s voice seemed to contain his anger. Isabella sat back at her desk as she wished.

“So, is it worth taking care of Sianna? Anything difficult?”

“Doesn’t exist.”

It’s a lie. There was no way it wouldn’t be hard.

The new drug she injected didn’t cause strong hallucinations, unlike her previous one, but it was a drug that made people extremely depressed. Ciana, whose mind was so clouded that normal communication and even basic self-care were impossible, was no different from being addicted to a strong painkiller.

Even though Mason has a stronger mind than others, it can’t be easy for her to feed, wash, and change her underwear every day for someone who can’t do anything on her own.

So why is she rebelling so much?

I just need to adapt and be part of my family.

Isabella felt sorry for Mason. She was a foolishly honest person. So even though she herself had deceived her and ruined her sister and Sianna, she could not escape her guilt and responsibility towards them.

But as if a corner stone is beaten, and a dog that disobeys orders is trained.

Now, all these courses were the education Mason needed.

“I’m glad then. Do you know what to do today?”

In response to her question, Mason silently nodded her head. Her routine was always fixed. Simple things that are repeated and repeated like rolling a hamster wheel.

“Okay. I just need to know.”

Isabella turned back to the papers,

“I’ll count it as what I received with this report. You can go out now.”

Mason gave her permission and she immediately left her room with her Sianna. It was clear from her demeanor that she didn’t want to be here at all.

Isabella hummed lightly at her as she looked at her papers. It was clear to her why she made Mason do the same thing every day.

If she couldn’t break Mason with pressure, she had to take a new approach.

There is no way that Shiana will show signs of remission from the unchanging daily routine.

In this mansion she hates more than anyone else, life repeats itself every day.

Her daily tiredness was waiting to slowly eat away at her.

Anyway, Mason was already trapped. As long as she couldn’t get her foot out of her bear trap, she would eventually have to accept her fate.

“How long can you do it?”

In the end, in front of her destiny to adapt, how long can Mason endure with hope?

Thinking it wouldn’t be long, Isabella turned her attention to her new papers.

After leaving Isabella’s office, Mason made his way to the first floor with the help of other servants. A specially made sunshade was installed in her wheelchair, in which Sianna sits. It was to protect Shiana’s eyesight, as her pupils’ constriction and expansion slowed down.

Mason, standing at the entrance of her mansion with Cianna, whose shade was slightly off-white under her shade, addressed her to Cianna, mimicking her supposedly cheerful voice.

“Shall we go out?”

Mason carefully pushed the wheelchair into the garden.

It was so green that I couldn’t even remember the desolate appearance of the last garden I came to. The grasses that the gardeners tidy up every day were shining bright green, and the flowers were adorned with brilliant colors.

Feeling slightly out of breath as she came outside, Mason took a deep breath in her. Mason slowly pushed his wheelchair past a fountain with well-carved statues spewing water, and along the fence of a garden arranged as if reminiscent of a labyrinth.

When she was in this garden, where the smell of her thick grass and flowers bloomed, her Mason’s memory of playing here as a child naturally came to her.

“… Is it Siana?”

Mason unknowingly called her Sianna. I couldn’t hear Cyana’s answer, but the soft summer breeze enveloped them making a small sound.

Mason hopes that Cianna is listening, and she quietly begins to speak her mind.

“I used to play here often in the past. With Lucia, with Becky, with Isabella.”

It was a memory that could not be called a memory now because it was dirty, but at that time she was happy. It was a memory full of laughter, not knowing what kind of person each other would grow into.

“While playing hide and seek, even if we just brush each other’s clothes with our hands, we insist that we win, and my younger sister sees me and her older sister says that they are at a disadvantage because they are too tall and different from us…”

It was a time that could never be returned, and there was an irreversible gap between now and then.

“… At that time, I didn’t know that Isabella would change like this.”

She sounded like an excuse for not noticing the danger herself, but it was the obvious truth. In her childhood memories, Isabella hoped for some attention in the absence of her parents’ love. She was the child who cried more than anyone else when she left her neighborhood.

“If I had known, I would not have brought you here.”

It was a vague regret with no way to undo it. In the end, the situation the two faced now was a terrible situation. Mason whispered quietly to relieve her frustration.

“I should have told you earlier. I’m sorry I put you in this situation.”

Her apology contained an apology that could not be fully said. I’m sorry I couldn’t accept her heart. Sorry that it was her wrong choice that brought her to her hometown in the first place. Sorry for making her think she would loathe her siana.

“It’s my fault.”

I wanted you to be happy I hoped to get over the wounds and stand up again.

I hoped to get my smile back again. Because you are my family

“… My complacency and greed have brought you to this state.”

She truly felt that way. Isabella had become a terrible monster. A monster who hurts those around him and doesn’t know how to think of others.

Faced with an irresistible calamity, Mason was feeling discouraged and self-deprecating.

That’s why she couldn’t give up on Siana.

Because it was her own wrong choice.

“Yes, Siana.”

Mason whispered, still latching on to her wheelchair so it wouldn’t roll off on its own. She ducked under Cianna’s canopy so that she could face her, and then she crouched down to her eye level with her.

“Shall we run away?”

At least it would be better than being here.

Even if there are no people who can help us.

Even if you meet a pitiful and bitter death.

“Can I at least repay you for all the pain you’ve been through?”

Even if Siana suffers from not being able to receive the antidote that she needs to be given regularly, even if the side effects are trembling from the cold, spitting harsh words, and trying to kill me.

At least you can die like a human being rather than here.

When you die, I’ll follow you and take care of you.

I didn’t do it right here, but I’ll make up for it on the second chance.

“… If you can hear me Can you blink twice?”

When I realized that my voice was splitting, tears welled up in my eyes. Mason barely held on.

She couldn’t cry in front of her. She could no longer show her weakness.

“… Then, even now, I will run away even if I topple you…”

Mason looked at Cianna, forcing the corners of her trembling lips to move.

There was no hard closing of her eyes.