Chapter 57 – 57. Alone
As soon as I finished the laundry, I ran away and headed outside the cathedral.
The nuns, who knew nothing, sent me off with gentle smiles.
The feeling of guilt grew for some reason.
The decision to close the chapel has not changed.
The reason was that it was necessary to investigate whether there were additional monsters.
For the first time in a while, I tried to have a conversation with the goddess, but it ended up being a disappointment.
No. There is no need to feel sorry.
I concentrated my consciousness for a moment and entered the inner world.
『Uh, Goddess? Goddess Isis?』
I called out to the goddess and looked around her.
The only thing in this pitch-black inner world is the fluttering leaves of lilies.
There was nothing else to see.
『Goddess~? Are you busy, goddess?』
Even if I called again, there was no response.
It’s been like this since a while ago.
I was the only person who entered the inner world.
Did you have some urgent business?
They almost always greet you first with a practical joke, but there’s a lot going on.
Consciousness was brought back to the surface.
I slowly took a step forward.
Is it because I’ve gotten used to being surrounded by crazy people these past few days?
The empty side is particularly chilly.
However, it is still difficult to find someone.
Amy and Ariel ran away a little while ago, saying they were busy, and it’s hard to even find where Debbie is since she didn’t show up in the first place.
And Liliana…
“By the way, today is Sunday, right?”
I clapped my hands softly.
There is no knight training on weekends.
Liliana has no way of putting off her paperwork, so she should be resting comfortably in her mansion today.
If I come to visit you, I’m sure you’ll run out in socks.
She immediately changed the direction she was walking.
Her steps suddenly became lighter.
I was already starting to see Liliana jumping around and looking happy.
***
“The master went out early in the morning.”
The old butler with a dandy beard smiled bitterly and answered with an expression of disapproval.
The maids behind her also looked at each other.
He seemed to be shaking with anxiety, wondering if he had offended me.
Of course, it’s not even anyone’s fault, so it’s nothing to be angry about.
I’m just embarrassed by the unexpected situation.
I asked the old butler with a dumbfounded expression.
“Uh, can you tell me where you went?”
“I’m sorry, but we haven’t received the message from you either. “The only thing I can say is that he goes to the forest to collect medicinal herbs.”
“Don’t you even know which forest it is? At least some kind of herb.”
“It’s really shameless.”
The old butler bowed his head and apologized.
When I saw that, I felt drained.
“Could you please tell me what business you are here for? “I will deliver it to the master as soon as he returns.”
“Yes? Oh, hey, that’s…”
He hesitated and avoided answering.
I can’t speak.
How can I say that I was so lonely that I just wanted to see your face?
You won’t look like an adolescent girl in love.
A suitable excuse came up in her head.
However, my conscience, which had already lied once, kept interfering with my thoughts.
“Bye, it wasn’t a big deal. “I have something to discuss briefly.”
“Don’t decline. “We are responsible for causing this precious person to walk in vain.”
He is a man who is faithful to his duties as a deacon.
If it were any other time, I would have appreciated his personality, but to me now, it was just a distraction.
I waved both hands at the old butler.
“No, no, it’s such a minor thing. “I will personally deliver it to Liliana later.”
“Hmm. “If the saint says so.”
Without further inquiry, the old gentleman nodded and bowed politely.
The maids bowed modestly following him.
In response to the burdensome greeting, I put my hands together as if praying.
I walked away from the mansion with empty steps.
Even Liliana is absent.
If I had known this would happen, I would have just laid out the iron plate and stayed with the nuns.
***
Still, since I had come all the way to downtown Luz, I decided to enjoy the remaining time to the fullest.
I ate two crepes that I had never tasted in my previous life.
I enjoyed street performances and the sweet songs of bards.
From time to time, I talked about various things with people who recognized me.
It was fun.
…
It will be fun.
It’s clear that time passes quickly.
But there was nothing I could do about this emptiness that was frustrating my heart.
I took out my pocket watch.
It was already well past 6 o’clock.
She sat down on the bench and lifted her head blankly.
The sunset that burned the sky red was fading little by little, leaving behind starlight instead of ash.
I looked back on my day while enjoying the cool air between spring and summer.
“Ha…”
I couldn’t understand why I was doing this.
Didn’t you hate being fucked every night for these past few months?
I was the one who desperately wanted this kind of free time.
As soon as I got the freedom I so desperately wanted, my mind started to go crazy.
Don’t you go to Liliana’s mansion on your own? Don’t you feel lonely even though you do everything you want?
Could it be that I was being brainwashed by those four people without my knowledge?
“Huh, saint?”
As I was repeating self-reflection, I heard a familiar voice.
When I looked that way, I saw one animal and one person I had seen before.
A giant salamander with skin the color of a bright red sunset.
Next to him, a girl with a refreshing look with rabbit eyes as if surprised.
It was Elena Schubert.
“Hello, Miss Elena. “Are you coming home now?”
“Yes. “I’m a bit late because I went for a walk with Sally.”
“Sally?”
When I tilted my head, the red salamander stuck out its tongue.
Aha. Her name is Sally because she is a salamander.
It’s a simple but cute naming sense.
“You seem to have a good relationship with your servant.”
“Sure. “He is like my own younger brother.”
Elena, with a cheerful smile, lightly stroked Salamander’s head.
Sally purred and wagged her thick tail to express her joy.
“Why is the saint here?”
“Oh, I…”
Instead of trying to answer, she closed her mouth tightly.
Isn’t it too ugly to say something like that to a student who is much younger than me, saying that he is lonely because he is alone?
“Saint?”
Clean green eyes looked into me.
The girl’s expression was as clear as distilled water.
Is it because I suffered from loneliness all day?
The desire to talk about what was on my mind was boiling over.
Even if the target is a girl you only shook hands with on the street once.
I hesitated and moved my lips.
Anyone can do it, so I wanted to relieve this stuffiness.
Eventually, she broke out of silence and carefully told the story.
“Well, actually…”
Of course, we filter out as much as possible any content that may be harmful to minors.
***
“Hmm, hmm. So, what you’re saying is that the saintess felt very lonely today without her colleagues around, right?”
“Yes, that’s right.”
“It never happened like that until a few days ago, but suddenly today?”
“Yeah, that’s right.”
There were times when he would hug me first when he was out at night, saying he was lonely, but I decided not to say that.
Children shouldn’t know this.
Hmm, Elena thought for a moment.
Eventually, the refreshing girl came to a conclusion.
“That might be proof that the saint is in love with her.”
“… Yes!?”
What does this mean?
She was shocked and denied it in a loud voice.
“That can’t be possible! I am a priest! This kind of romantic feelings…”
“No, no, I’m talking about love with the warrior party.”
Isn’t that what it means?
I blinked and looked at the girl’s face.
“Because not all love means dating. The love I have for my colleagues also makes a lot of sense.”
“Ah, aha. “You were talking about friendship.”
Phew, what else can I say?
Her heated face slowly cooled down.
The bright red sunset sky made it impossible for me to notice the condition of my face.
Elena continued her words with an innocent expression, as if she didn’t notice my relief.
“If you eat cake alone, it’s dry and just sweet, but if you eat it with friends, it turns into a delicious and wonderful snack. “Isn’t that the same thing?”
I don’t really like cake, so I can’t relate, but I decided to listen more first.
“I guess the saint felt that way too. No matter what I do, I think of my other colleagues, and I want to be with them wherever I go. Because that is love.”
This child doesn’t even notice unfamiliar sounds.
I felt embarrassed for no reason, so I looked up to the sky.
Words such as love and friendship cannot express these complex feelings.
Nevertheless, the reason I listened to Elena’s words was because the tightness in her heart was relieved a little.
Elena remained silent for a moment and wiggled her fingers as if embarrassed.
“Now that I say it, I feel really embarrassed. Is it okay for someone like me to say something like this to Daeseongnyeo, hehe…”
“Don’t say things like that. “I was very grateful for the advice.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”
She looked at the girl sitting next to her with a small smile.
“Thank you. Thanks to you, I was able to face my heart just a little bit more.”
“I’m glad that happened.”
Elena laughed brightly and got up from her bench.
Salamander, who had been quietly dozing next to her, also woke up.
“Are you going?”
“Yes. “If you’re too late, the dormitory door will be locked.”
“Oh my. It looks like I wasted time.”
“No, no! “I am so glad that my advice was helpful!”
I’m glad you did.
I was worried that I would be seen as a pathetic adult who opens up about his troubles to younger people.
She got up and saw Elena off.
Clear green eyes stared at my chest.
Soon, he looked to the side, probably thinking it was rude.
You are such a sincere student.
As long as it doesn’t look sinister, I don’t really care.
“Okay, then I’m done! Enjoy the rest of your weekend!”
“Yes, Miss Elena. May the Goddess’ blessing always be with you.”
I said a short blessing.
Elena ran as if she was running away from me, probably because of the strict curfew.
It’s not even 8 o’clock yet, but the dormitory rules seem to be quite strict.
Students have a lot of trouble in this world too.
She felt a little bitter.
