Chapter 15 – The Hero and the Saint (3)
A month has passed since Aria and I stayed in this village.
We seem to have managed to become celebrities in town.
Also got a nickname.
‘Was it the title of a bloody warrior and a bloody nun?’
It was a nickname I couldn’t laugh at.
Looking at the frost on the window, I remembered the past.
Like that ridiculous nickname, I counted the days when the blood dried on my clothes.
I can count on my hand the number of days the blood dried on my clothes.
They killed every day with the momentum to stop the seeds of the monsters spreading across Mount Ascendio, so it was hard not to get blood on them.
I don’t know, but it must have contributed quite a bit to adjusting the number of monsters.
Arya might have a hard time, but she followed along well without complaining.
At first, I thought I was very patient.
But I soon realized that it wasn’t.
‘I can hold on.’
‘It’s not hard.’
‘Ah, I’m still fine.’
Regardless of whether or not she could bear it, she just endured, endured, and endured.
Being patient is a separate issue.
Do it because
Do it without giving up.
Even if you are broken, do it.
That was no longer the realm of normal thinking.
My former colleagues, who had better stamina than Arya, used to get away with my enthusiastic monster hunting.
Would he have been pointed at as a man crazy about monsters?
Moreover, Arya’s basic stamina also belonged to the poor axis.
There was no way this kind of forced march would go well.
‘I wish I’d noticed earlier.’
I sighed and looked at Arya who was groaning on the bed.
Her face is red like a ripe tomato.
Seeing that foolish look made me angry for no reason.
As a result, the words I spat out were quite sharp.
“Someone told me to take a break. Then why did you force yourself to make this sadal?”
Arya replied as if talking to herself with half-closed eyes.
“… I hated it because I felt like Mr. Einstein was getting caught because of me.”
Doesn’t this idiot not know that it’s more difficult to be sick because he overworked himself?
I wanted to hit a strong chestnut on my forehead, but I rested my chin, remembering that I was a patient.
“Even if you force it, you have to look at your physical condition and do it. Is there no such thing as flexibility?”
At the repeated questioning, Arya stuck out her lips like a duck.
“Yes, sorry for being inflexible.”
“Would you mind fixing it if you knew that?”
At least my former co-workers took good care of my body.
I changed the wet towel on her forehead.
It was a hot forehead like a ball of fire.
It’s like a pitiful palpion.
“And how about grabbing my ankle? You can catch it a few times.”
“… I mean, I didn’t want to bother you.”
“Why didn’t you like it? Do you think I will bother you?”
Arya kept her mouth shut.
It seemed to be on the right track.
She is a really hands-on girl.
“Nothing like that. You are a colleague.”
Colleague.
At that, Arya raised an eyebrow.
Seeing him smiling even though he’s sick makes me think he’s crazy.
“Thank you for thinking that way.”
Thank you, thank you to the guy who freezes to death.
I answered bluntly.
“Stop laughing and go to sleep.”
As I tried to stand up, my sleeve caught me.
I knew who caught it even if I didn’t say it.
It was aria
“I don’t want to sleep, I have nightmares.”
It was something she wouldn’t have said if she was a normal woman.
Are you the type of child who becomes more irritable when you are sick?
“You have to sleep to see improvement even with a cold.”
She shook her head from side to side.
“… Please stay by my side just a little longer.”
Her voice, stained with heat and moisture, was deadly as if it were tempting men.
More than any succubus I’ve seen before.
I pressed my temples and endured a migraine.
“Do you know what you are talking about? A saint?”
I have no idea.
Isn’t she a saint who led a life of faith that had nothing to do with men?
Her dark eyes stare at me.
It’s really pretty when you look at it like this.
Arya pursed her lips.
“I know. As far as what I’m talking about.”
Bitch to know.
I pinched her nose and patted her shoulder.
“I’m going.”
“Do not go. Please. … I am scared alone.”
She was a pitiful trembling aria.
She even wanted to turn away, but she remembered her older sister from childhood, so she couldn’t bitterly refuse.
Eventually she sat down on the bed.
“I’ll stay until you get a good night’s sleep.”
Arya then laughed hihi.
“That is enough.”
Later, when she found her mate, she saw a future she would kick the covers off of.
Well, that’s something to think about when you go.
I brushed the hair in front of me.
“So, what do you want to do with me by your side?”
When I asked rather spitefully, Arya rubbed her head against my chest and groaned.
After that, isn’t it like a bright sunflower?
“Hug me.”
“… What?”
I was about to bite my tongue.
“Hug me tight.”
I acknowledged that sick Arya is a stronger enemy than she thought.
How can you be stronger when you’re sick than when you’re fine?
* * *
My head is pounding.
It seems that the recoil that has moved excessively in the meantime is returning.
When Mr. Einstein told me to rest several times, he said that if he had rested, this wouldn’t have happened.
It must have been that she was over-enthusiastic.
I’m sorry for myself.
I don’t even know my topic, so I’m holding him back like this.
Endless self-doubt and self-loathing extend like a noose.
It’s absurd to say that the person who uses the Holy Law to heal others is doing a little bit of sickness.
“Sigh.”
I let out a deep sigh.
I could have done better, but it’s stupid.
However, Einstein will not be disappointed with me and send me back to the church.
Because I’m not that kind of person.
‘Is it a denomination?’
I realized it only after living far away.
That I don’t want to go back to the church.
It is a comfortable environment that cannot be compared to when I was in the church.
It was okay not to forcefully deal with men, and it was okay not to act like a saint.
… But.
The fact that my existence is a hindrance to Mr. Einstein remains as a disgrace.
I don’t like it, to block such a kind person’s path.
If that’s the case, I’m thinking it might be a good idea to go back.
Goddess. What should I do?
My head hurts.
I really, really think about cigarettes a lot.
I stretched out my hand to get myself up.
Then something caught.
It is a skin that is firm and full of elasticity.
“Yes?”
What I touched was Mr. Einstein’s forearm.
Brain freeze came.
Why are you by my side?
Doesn’t this look like a man and a woman who have gone through a rebellion?
No, of course! I know Mr. Einstein isn’t the type to do that!
As I rustled, Mr. Einstein quietly opened his eyes.
He stares at me with less tiredness.
“Are you awake, thanks to you, I couldn’t sleep at all.”
“Yes?”
Didn’t you catch a breath?
No way.
Did you really, really sleep together?
Uh, why?
What the hell is going on in the broken memories?
There are countless question marks.
“I didn’t expect it to come like this… , At this point, Aria, don’t you think of me as a teddy bear?”
Come hug me
Me, me?
Uh, can that be?
Don’t you remember?
Hiding my agitation, I asked a question.
“Me, me, me, me why, why, why Mr. Einstein goes with me, me, together, there, there.”
Words that break off every syllable.
I know my reaction is strange.
I was aware, but there was no way to stop the trembling from coming out.
That, he will be like that, why, why, in the same bed with Mr. Einstein, are you so special like this…
‘Do not go.’
‘I’m scared of being alone.’
‘Hug me.’
‘Hug me tightly.’
Suddenly, the words that came out of my mouth passed by like a kaleidoscope.
I finally remembered everything.
Why is Mr. Einstein in bed?
Why am I in his arms
Aaaaa
Aaaaa
No, this memory is a kaleidoscope.
Because I will die after that.
I jumped out of bed.
And opened the window that was closed.
A cool wind blows.
It’s winter in full swing now.
It’s a good day to commit.
As I was about to throw myself, Mr. Einstein, who is not sure when he woke up, grabbed me by the waist.
The strong power that I felt from my thick forearm, my sudden commitment, has been put to nothing.
“Hey, let go, let go. Me, i… I, I don’t have the confidence to live with this shameful memory! My, please! Uh, how can you live with these memories!”
Even at my fuss, he only gave me a soft smile.
“Looks like you’ve lost a cold.”
Those were soft words.
At the same time, it was also a kind word.
“It really bothered me…”
He sees me
Neither the eyes of rebuke nor the eyes of resentment.
You don’t want me to say this.
You make me not even blame myself.
He’s a cruel person.
I swallowed.
“… Thank you for being by my side.”
Say thank you, not sorry.
He smiles kindly and strokes my hair.
“Hungry. Let’s have a meal.”
Careless yet carefree words.
Those words that give me peace.
“Ah.”
During this month, living with him, I realized.
I came to understand it naturally.
That I fell in love with this person.
Love comes unexpectedly, though.
There is also soft hair that permeates like clothes getting wet from drizzle.
My heart is probably closer to the latter.
At the same time, I realized how absurd and useless it is.
Does a filthy thing like me deserve to love him?
I am not qualified.
I don’t have the right to love someone.
The fact that I was a man also acts as a psychological rejection factor.
Even bigger than that is the number of men I’ve had sex with.
Who would like me who was harassed by countless men?
I would have been disgusted if I were the opposite.
Who likes a girl like me who gives her body to everyone?
So it had to be hidden.
This feeling that I adore him.
It must be gradually suppressed.
“If I’m absent-minded, will I eat alone?”
Says Mr. Einstein.
I can feel my heart beating at the sound of his voice.
I want to hear more of your voice.
That desire beats my heart.
But you will have to suppress it.
Even if it’s painful, even if it’s sad.
Because there must be a woman more suitable for you.
It happens like this, but not me.
Because there must be someone more worthy.
Still.
Until that worthy companion comes by your side.
Wouldn’t it be okay if I was by your side?
“… Let’s go together.”
It was two weeks later that people from the church came to visit us.
