Chapter 199 – 199 – Face Your Failures
“What are you doing?”
Just as she was holding onto the noose and sighing, a question was heard from behind her.
Adamantone lost the rope and floundered. The uninvited guest watched quietly as the warrior collapsed under the wooden footrest. And when Ada Manton, who had hit his butt, got up and drew his sword, he carefully took a step back.
The identity of the uninvited guest was an elf forest keeper. As the opponent looked at the rope and himself, Adamantone, embarrassed, lowered his head and gritted his teeth.
“I followed him because he was suspicious, but it seems it wasn’t a small matter.”
The forest keeper, who was looking at the hero’s sword with only the hilt and base remaining, with a strange expression, carefully put the bow he had drawn out for security purposes back on his shoulder.
“How did you lose the blade?”
“···Leave it to yourself.”
“I see. I have more urgent matters to attend to at the moment. Are you planning to hang yourself in the forest reserve of Greater Elan?”
“You figure it out!”
“Elan’s forest keeper is both a soldier and a tree manager. If someone were to hang themselves in the Hero family’s courtyard, how would the guards on duty at your house respond?”
“They’ll beat me up and kick me out.”
“I will stop it for now. My role is similar. I cannot allow a pessimistic suicide with poop on his pants to spoil the beauty of the walkway.”
“So what? It won’t turn off?”
As the crying Adamantine approached him, the elf stretched out his hands and stepped back.
“But rather than forcing them out, I would like to approach them in a more peaceful way.”
“Why are you scared to fight with a hero aspirant by the collar?”
“That’s true, but it’s because your expression doesn’t make sense.”
Adamanthon saw his face reflected in the half of the sword’s base. Even in his own eyes, he is a miserable, broken human being.
“If you need someone to listen to your concerns, I can at least talk to you.”
“···There’s no need for that.”
“I’ve already decided to die, so what’s there to lose? Why don’t you at least leave a few words?”
“It’s a waste of time. Adamantone Sunstorm had better disappear a few seconds sooner. For the sake of House Sunstorm or for anyone else.”
And he does it for himself. Adamantone swallowed his last words.
I don’t know why. I had a strange feeling that it would have to be that way.
Adamantone waved his hand in a threatening gesture and then put his feet upright again.
“Do you know who I am?”
“Adamantone Sunstorm. It’s hard not to know. His name has been featured in all kinds of media, whether it’s the Party Alliance’s weekly magazine or One Sun magazine.”
At one time, Adamantone wanted to become a celebrity.
He is a rare warrior who did not have such a dream when he was young. There were many people like Adamanton who couldn’t let go of it even as an adult.
And, as is usually the case with boyhood wishes, the wish was only partially granted. And that too in an unwanted way.
You could see magazines with your face written all over them everywhere. In the guest room in Hwanhangok, on the transcontinental train that escaped from Hwanhangok, and in the house of the Skirnir forest keeper.
There are many words written in the appendix below the portrait. Of course, there are no words of praise that I had hoped for.
There is a reward for reporting eyewitnesses and accusations of evil deeds. I’ve never dreamed of anything like that, even in my nightmares.
An act of large-scale murder by hiring pirates to attack the ‘Queen’s Handgun’ and the ‘Special Monster Destruction Elimination Team’. And as a result, embezzlement, breach of mission contract, and violation of employment law were exposed
There were also vivid testimonies from past relationships that testified to petty thefts and verbal abuse. There were so many people who wanted to say something, it was almost funny how I made so many enemies.
What was the way they treated the wizard Moriba and the healer Mindina? According to what a third party revealed, there were ‘women who were treated like tools’ at Adamantone’s party.
The expert said that depending on the interpretation of the law, it could be a crime of adultery by force.
Of course, it was not written how the two parties to the incident viewed the incident. It looks like the reporters haven’t found the two yet.
And Adamantone himself never asked directly.
It was unfair. ‘It was clearly visible that he was trying to live up to his family’s name’, that would not be an excuse from a normal person.
“If someone were to cry out that such a race of humans should be given a second chance, it would sound absurd even to my ears.”
“I see.”
“It’s no big deal that everyone knows about my failures. Do you know what’s really terrible?”
Adamantone cried as he pulled the rope taut.
“It was only when I could no longer turn back that I realized that I was a terrible person.”
“Well, everyone is like that. What’s different about everyone else except you?”
The forest keeper shrugged his shoulders. In Adamantone’s eyes, the gesture seemed to crush his misfortune like a child’s whining.
“What do you want to say?”
“Well, it takes a lot of luck to become who you want to be. Around this time 200 years ago, I thought I would have been promoted to general and be enjoying my vacation surrounded by my grandchildren. Isn’t the reality harsh? Still a low-ranking class. I was in trouble as an executive, my wife had to leave due to tick fever, and my vacation this year was cut off because I was caught drinking and napping during work.”
The forest keeper paused for a moment and added frankly.
“Actually, it would be more correct to say that I drank and took a nap to the point where I got cut off. It wasn’t just once or twice.”
“You were a loser comrade. There seem to be a lot of strong trees nearby. Shall we go side by side?”
“I’m not finished talking yet.”
The forest keeper politely shook his head and refused to accompany me.
“In addition, being alive ultimately means harming someone. Some of us farm on land buried with the blood of the aliens our ancestors massacred.
Others pretend to be indifferent to sectarian oppression, but secretly rejoice when they hear that pagans have left because they can’t stand it. Betraying your family, eating away at your neighbors’ backs, squeezing out the screams of nature as if you were breathing…”
“There are a lot of people like me whose dreams have been shattered, and there are a lot of trash like me, so should we all live with the same iron face? Are you saying that is comfort? ‘One Sun’ magazine asked about my issue.
The bounty my family placed on me hasn’t been lifted yet, and more than ten countries, from Armatam to Tovetan, have issued me a wanted order! But to accept it casually? Are other people having the same difficult time? Fuck you!”
“There aren’t that many people like you. There aren’t that many people who see running away as a solution to their problems. People around you should help so that there aren’t too many of them.”
The forest keeper took out a weekly magazine from his arms. Adamantone flinched at the sound of the paper unfolding.
“It’s hard to say that I’m taking your side, but here is an editorial that is somewhat friendly to you.”
“···What is it?”
Adamantone unconsciously trembled at the earnestness in his voice.
The forest keeper pretended not to notice it.
“
Because I moved to a hotel restaurant before he turned 17
… Now that I think about it, you come from a rich family, so much so that you had a chef at your party.
You cheap, short-lived bastard, why don’t you find some medicine to extend your lifespan? I’m sorry. I was shocked for a moment. My wallet is not in good condition these days.”
“···Don’t add unnecessary words and keep going.”
“Anyway.
I don’t know about the story of failure of a child named Adamantone.
As I remember him, he was just a stubborn and motivated child.
He was also a boy who wanted to become an exemplary and great warrior like his father. I don’t know what kind of misfortune happened in the life of such a warrior, but it’s just a pity if things turned out that way.
They say.”
The forest keeper raised his head. There was clear agitation in Adamantone’s dry eyes.
“A horse like you shouldn’t be given a second chance? That’s a good start. Self-objectification serves as a solid stepping stone for whatever you do in the future. Clearly, there is no one anywhere who can pick up spilled water.”
“Damn. Damn. I didn’t want it to end up like this…”
“But at the same time, no one is born to repeat what they cannot do. Instead of standing around holding an empty cup and trying to figure out how to collect it, fill it with new water.”
“···Then will something be resolved?”
“I can tell you from an experienced person’s point of view, in fact, nothing can be solved. You will live your whole life regretting the possibilities beyond the door that has already been closed. ‘I should have done better then’. ‘I should have paid more attention when I was younger.’ Of course,’ You will often think, ‘I should have hung myself instead of being captivated by the long-eared old man’s nonsense.'”
“What kind of comfort is this, you damn bastard?”
“What can I do? If I live life with to sugarcoat of being beautiful, won’t it come back to me cursing me when I get disappointed and give up again? I don’t like that.”
Adamantone stepped forward, raising his fist. The elf quickly covered his face and ran away.
“No matter how well you do in the future, the score on the scoreboard will not change. Since you score more points than you concede, you do not have the right to shamelessly ask for forgiveness. Life is not a game that plays by those rules.”
“I know, you bastard!”
“But if you don’t even try to turn things around, or if you give up because the road to turning things around seems rough and scary.”
The forest keeper held up the illustration from the weekly magazine like a shield.
Adamantone flinched as he discovered himself as a child. He seemed to have recycled a portrait of an enemy he had interviewed with the Party Federation a long time ago.
“Wouldn’t you feel a little sorry for the child with so many dreams back then?”
“Say one more word.”
Adamantone roughly snatched the weekly paper. Then he tore it up and threw it on the floor.
“I will rip out your tongue.”
“···Oh my.”
The forest keeper lowered his head, looked at me, then immediately turned around and walked away. Adamantone had a blank expression.
“What? You’re just going to leave?”
The forest keeper looked back at Adamantone and put his finger to his own mouth. Then he repeated the process of zipping and fastening her zipper.
Adamantone, who was in a terribly pitiful mood, spoke in a helpless voice.
“I won’t pick you, so tell me.”
“If you want to rip out my tongue, I have to go. What should I do? I don’t have the confidence to convince you if I don’t talk. I’m not good at fighting. If you want to knock me out and hang me, I’ll never be able to stop you.”
“···That is correct.”
“Furthermore, you are not the only people for whom we are responsible. There are also people who are said to have come from the ‘demon world.’ Just the hundreds of people complaining of nutritional imbalance and mental illness are already enough to bother me. Even at this very moment, surveillance personnel are in place. If we don’t stick together, the injured may die.”
Adamantone was convinced. And he became a little embarrassed.
“Lastly, seeing how you got angry at the last few sarcastic remarks, it seems like you still have enough energy left to be angry about your situation. That’s a positive sign.”
The forest guard, who quietly retreated about ten steps further, suddenly pulled out his bow and aimed.
At that moment, Adamantone swung his warrior sword like a thunderbolt and tried to hit the arrow. My mind and body were rusty from worry, but the teachings of the warrior family were still engraved in my bones.
However, the place where the arrow was aimed was not Adamantone’s life. The noose rope broke at the arrowhead and fell to the floor.
“I’ve done enough. The choice is yours. I’ll go around blowing the trumpet, so listen and join.”
The forest keeper, putting his bow back on his body, shrugged his shoulders. And he really left.
Adamantone, who had been blankly repeating inhalation and exhalation for a while, looked back at the forest again as the sun tilted and illuminated his face.
Despite all the foolish acts and misdeeds he committed, the forest of Elan was still peaceful. Perhaps there will be a stain left on this landscape after the last misfortune, but even that will soon be erased and forgotten by the forest.
Adamantone hoped that he too would be forgotten. It’s a funny irony considering that it was his lifelong wish to make a name for himself.
“I was that child with many dreams back then.”
Adamantone immediately sneered. He himself did not know whether the object of ridicule was the forest guard or himself.
“Bullshit.”
Adamantone erased the elf’s foolishness from his mind. And he lifted Uja’s lighthouse high, with only his handle remaining.
Wasn’t it fate that lived up to the name of the sword until the end? Threatening others with a bladeless knife? Also, someone who is trying hard to save him.
But there is nothing wrong with the lighthouse. It was Uja who refused to be guided by the light.
The lighthouse in Uja must have also judged that way. The broken blade found a new owner. A master who is different from Adamantone in many ways.
Unlike Adamantone, Florica was raised by a villain, but was a warrior who knew how to overcome herself and return to the orbit of good.
Adamantone mumbled a farewell to his friend who had already left and threw the hilt of his sword far away. He swallowed the iron lump with the sound of clean lake water sloshing.
Adamantone bent down and picked up the fallen rope. And he climbed the tree again. There was still plenty of room left to tie a knot.
A hero with a bad mind is like a monster. Subjugation requires enormous resources.
In fact, there was a time when it became something similar to a monster. Gunther Waldenhardt called himself the successor. The Demon King’s fragment must have caught a glimpse of something resembling itself in Adamantone.
Adamantone had no intention of letting something loose and roam the world.
‘Not long ago, you praised me for doing something worthy of a warrior, Tan Bantai. Now I’m going to try that one last time.’
It is a subjugation operation that can be carried out very cheaply with just a well-tied rope. Adamantone tried to move his shaking hands properly.
‘I told you that I have not yet become a worthy warrior before you, Mancellarion. I’m sorry. It may be something you’re already familiar with, but you’ll be disappointed again.’
Decided not to think about his mother. Adamantone once again had doubts about whether his mother, who protected him, truly had pure love in her heart. I was also afraid to check it now.
After apologizing to everyone else who came to mind, Adamantone realized that he had completed his knot neatly. Now all you have to do is risk your neck.
But the hand that made his gallows held the noose and did not know how to fall. Even at this point, Adamantone slowly removed his trembling fingers one by one.
A terrified sob escaped. As if I had missed the edge of a cliff. Adamantone tried to punish himself for being weak until the end.
At that time, I heard footsteps behind me. Adamantone thought that the forest keeper had just returned.
Adamantone, swallowed by anger, widened his eyes and looked back.
“Hey, if that’s the case, why don’t you just shoot me in the head and help me out-“
Not a forest keeper. It was much smaller than that.
A boy with messy hair was whining and raising a knife.
It seemed like the problem wasn’t the weight, but rather not knowing how to handle it. After thinking for a while, the boy soon adjusted his sword-holding posture to something more plausible. And aimed straight at Adamantone.
Adamantone, who was staring blankly at the boy, came down from the pedestal. Even he himself wants to die, so it’s not his fault that he was stabbed.
This was because I was worried about the boy’s unstable posture. It seemed like he was going to drop the knife and stab himself in the foot.
However, what the boy was aiming for was not Adamantone. The enemy of the boy who could not see clearly due to his blonde hair covering his eyes was the object that Adamantone had been looking at with fear just a moment ago.
When Adamantone realized that the boy’s target was a noose hanging from a tree, he was struck by a strange feeling. The boy stared at Adamantone with bright eyes.
And he asks, anxiety fluttering in his eyes.
Is it perhaps making you sick and afraid?
Adamantone was about to ask who are you to ask that? But the question went down his throat before it even reached his uvula.
Adamantone realized that he knew the boy’s identity. Beneath the pale blond hair from his youth was the face of young Adamantone himself.
Young Adamantone looked at Adamantone with a worried expression as he felt symptoms of hyperventilation for the first time in his life.
Adamantone, who had barely regained his breathing, muttered his soothing words and held out a trembling hand. Just like his father did when he first tried to wield the Jingeom and was scolded.
A weapon with a bright blue blade is not something that can be held in the hands of a child.
The boy cowered for a moment, perhaps because he was afraid he would fly. But he soon slowly handed me the knife.
‘Is it really necessary?’
“It’s not because I need it.”
Adamantone answered with a lump in his throat.
“For you-“
Adamantone’s tongue stopped. The next moment, the child was gone.
Adamantone was once more startled by the feel of the sword hilt, which was lighter than expected.
The remaining half of Uza’s lighthouse was in his hand.
————
If you think about it, Mancellarion did not raise his child to be a runaway. He is both from his own sins and from the battlefield.
And so the son of Sunstorm returned. He wears a broken sword and holds a promise that has not yet been fulfilled.
‘I was a little worried because you were late, but you came back safely. Yes? ‘Take off your clothes?’
···And wearing a stolen forest keeper’s outfit.
Like all objects that intervened in Adamantone’s life, the noose rope did not serve its purpose. However, it was effective in gagging the forest guard and tying him to a tree.
The forest guard, who had his military uniform taken away and was left with only his underwear, is probably safe. Within half a day, the patrol had tied it up in a place where it could be found. Adamantone felt a little sorry and sad at the same time.
And after a few minutes, he felt like protesting violently.
”And there is something I would like to ask of Mithra.”
“What is it?”
“Will you accept my confession?”
It seems that the reason he managed to go undetected while entering the Amethyst Palace was because Heaven had prepared a special punishment for Adamantone.
Tan, disguised as Adamantone, was fawning over Mithra. She paid no heed to the clamor of the audience.
Adamantone, who witnessed Adamantone, keenly realized what kind of atmosphere it created.
The forest keeper was right. I’m already starting to miss the rope from the tree by the lake.
