Chapter 453 – Chapter 453. Today I Want to Do Well for My Precious Person
Suddenly, the number of videos on my channel has increased a lot.
Looking down through the array of videos, there are a lot of results I’ve made over the past few months.
I think this is good
When I’m doing other things, I don’t think I’ve ever done something that left me with a certain outcome.
Of course, there are things that make me grow a little more in one field through learning.
But again, because I like memories or things like this, it was good to see videos with many people directly like this.
‘Right, it was like this at this time.’
I got to see thumbnails of many videos.
In particular, when I was doing a joint broadcast, I went down watching mostly beauties, such as female cams, or aspiring actors or fitting models who came out as guests.
I thought while watching the videos I made.
It was good.
I feel like I’m staying
Remnants of really good times remain.
It may be a bit premature, but I feel that way sometimes.
Would you say you are afraid of death?
Paradoxically, since I am really living a life to the extent that I am satisfied with myself, I am sometimes afraid of death, which is the exact opposite of my life.
Everyone dies
I don’t know when that will be, but everyone will most likely end their lives painfully.
No chaebol, no competent person, no one can stop it.
So sometimes I like to stay like this.
When I see something very later, there are traces of my life, I hope there is.
I don’t want to die.
Never.
I want to live for 50,000 years.
But it can’t be like that.
I remember my grandparents’ wide wrinkled hands and huge dark spots.
I didn’t know when I was younger.
My grandparents were my grandparents since I was born, and I thought they were my grandparents.
By the way, it must have been for grandparents too.
That was when you were young.
Like me now, there must have been days where I ran around, laughed and chatted with people, drank alcohol, and fell asleep exhausted from running around.
However, the grandparents I saw were elderly and her movements were difficult.
For a few years after I was born, at least her grandparents played with me, and she even went with her family once in a while when they were far away.
But she didn’t after that.
My parents will be like that too.
And so will I.
I feel sad when I think of that future.
Hmm…
One day, my father and I were riding in the car alone, and I heard such words.
My father said that everyone in this world was pitiful.
Because he dies in the end.
At the same time, my father said that he felt especially sorry for my mother and me.
Because it’s family.
I have many days left to live.
Sometimes it feels like there’s too much left over.
But maybe it’s not that much.
Many people have confidence in their health, but there are cases where they lose their health and end their lives at once.
Then it seems more sad.
Even if you live long enough to enjoy a thousand years of life, your vitality in life may decrease due to your body getting old and sick due to old age.
Being old means that the natural death that every human being must face is getting closer, and the older you get, the more afraid you will be.
Although you have lived a long time, you may be worried about how to spend the remaining short time with your loved ones.
Also, because the loved one has grown old with you, you may feel sorry for the death of your loved one as well as yourself.
However, if you die of a disease even though you are not old, you may feel more regretful because you will live a shorter life.
I thought about it.
What is the more specific reason why you are afraid of death?
I think the first is because of the fear of the unknown.
If there is a heaven and a hell, I might not have lived a life worthy of going to heaven. I believe that such a world exists, but like the fruit fly I caught yesterday, wouldn’t it perish if I just die?
Fear of the unknown is the greatest.
And secondly, it is also because of pain.
Not many people face death comfortably.
There are many cases of leaving the world while sleeping, but usually it is not.
Even if you are lying in the hospital and have an oxygen respirator plugged in, if you are conscious, you will not be able to move, but there is a chance that you will be alive while hearing everything.
Ordinarily, he would lie there, waiting for his time to die, and die in extreme terror.
At that time, it seems very lonely.
I’m alone with my eyes closed, but there’s nothing beside me, I can’t move, and I feel so lonely.
If you have a disease, it will be more difficult and lonely because you can not speak properly in the pain of the disease and the pity for the destroyed body.
Such pain is perhaps less than the fear of the unknown, but perhaps it is more.
Also, three times I feel afraid of death because I feel sorry for the person I love.
I am not married now, but when I do, I will love my wife the most.
You can love your children too.
But I love my wife the most, and her children are likely next.
It is said that when you become a parent, you will love your children more, but right now I think I will love my wife the most.
If I die first in such a situation, I think I will feel very sorry for my wife, who will be in pain and shed tears because of my death.
Conversely, even if her wife dies first, she will be very sad because she dies before me.
In any case, I’m going to blame myself.
I wanted to do at least one more thing, but I think it’s too bad that I can’t.
“…”
As I scrolled through the videos, I felt my eyes blush for no reason when I thought of those thoughts.
Maybe everyone knows.
You all know that that day will come in the distant future, but you may not be thinking about it.
So I, too, thought about death until here and decided to laugh again.
“Ah~, let’s think of something interesting, think of something interesting.”
When I watch TV once in a while, I think it’s really amazing to see people who are called national MCs.
Those people must have feelings too, but I think it’s really great that they can only show happy emotions all the time.
Looking back, it’s ironic that it’s a job.
As a human being, I think it’s cool to have professional skills in any field, whether it’s medicine, welding, beauty, or chemistry.
If you work a lot and do well, you will be recognized more socially and enjoy a more prosperous life.
But the more you do that, the less time you have to make memories with your precious people.
If it is life to constantly live the balance, I wonder if life is a very busy road.
When I thought about it, I wanted to have a meal with my parents.
I decided to broadcast first and then have a meal with my parents.
I set the mindset with a happy heart again and contacted the female cams who would come as guests.
I planned to broadcast until evening, and then go to my parents’ house.
“Hello, this is Jinhyeok.”
-Oh, hello~!
“Yes. This afternoon’s broadcast time is~.”
I got in touch with them first.
In the case of this content, I did not do it under the command of Fine Man, but I made a suggestion from my side, and other female cams and male cams other than Fine Man decided to help.
And in the afternoon, I visited Fine Man’s studio, which I visit once in a while, with female cams.
At Fine Man’s studio, I enjoyed broadcasting.
The female cams that appeared as guests also enjoyed it, and with Fine Man and another male cam, a total of six people had a fun time.
In the case of this content, it was conducted as a kind of talk show.
Stories about my ideal type, stories about the drinking and eating show we had together last time, stories about the housing of me and female cams, stories about our private lives, and so on, we all laughed and had fun on the air.
It was fun while broadcasting.
“Hohoho! Jinhyeok oppa is a real man, but is he picking up numbers like that?”
“Ah~, that can’t be the case. Once in a while…”
“Cuckold! Once in a while! Every time I go out with you on a broadcast, I see girls who say, ‘I’m a fan~’ and try to get your number. Every time I see it!”
Haha! Ah, hyung~! You know it’s real~!”
“Ho-ho-ho!”
Haha!”
“Chuckling!”
When I was alone at home, I was thinking about something a bit worrying, but it definitely seemed like something like that.
It seems that there are times when I feel a bit depressed when I am alone, and when I meet people, it seems like I enjoy playing with them.
So you’re saying that people can’t live alone?
I thought so too.
Originally, humans can be weak in fear when alone, but when so many people gather, I don’t know why, and I feel like I’m getting stronger as I am assimilated into their vitality.
So, rather, I felt more refreshed while working.
After the broadcast, I went to see my parents as scheduled.
That was something I decided before I started broadcasting.
Someday in the future, whether it be parents, wives, or children, there might come a day when it would be difficult to meet them, but right after I thought that, I still wanted to see my parents, who are the most precious people to me at the moment.
My parents and I went to an expensive Korean restaurant.
Originally, it is normal to open a chicken restaurant and work all the time, but I asked my parents to leave the restaurant for temporary workers only and come to eat, so I was able to have a meal with my parents.
My parents didn’t seem particularly happy, but deep down they were.
It’s not like I see my parents once or twice.
Sitting at a Korean restaurant, sharing a meal with my parents while menus are served together, my mother talked to me.
“You’re buying today? What kind of money do you have?”
To her mother’s words, I gave an answer while looking around moderately.
“I worked. I’m earning money by working, so I don’t come home and live there all the time. Don’t worry.
When I said that, my father clicked his tongue slightly.
“Tsk tsk, you have to get a job quickly. If you get a job and earn money, the quality of money you earn is different than if you just do other things. There is private insurance.”
“Haha, I know.”
I answered.
And I ate with my parents.
“It’s delicious, try some more of this.”
“Oh, Mom, eat. It’s over here too.”
“Let go, let go. Eat whatever you want.”
“You need to circulate blood, so eat a lot of this.”
“Oh, okay, okay.”
Haha, ah, Dad, but haven’t you been wearing those shoes for quite some time?”
I call mom and dad as mother and father, but usually it’s a bit awkward, so I tend to say mom and dad more often.
“What does that mean? I wear comfortable shoes to work anyway.”
After hearing my father’s words, I pushed an envelope each in front of my father and mother.
“I saved a little while working, but go shopping at least once.”
Mom immediately picked up her envelope and checked the money, and Dad saw her mom check her money and then checked her dad’s envelope as well.
“200 for 2 people, 400… You must have had a hard time working while preparing to become a civil servant. You buy something delicious or something like that. Why don’t you give it to me~?”
Mom had her say.
“I’ll put it all into a bank account with your name on it, so don’t do this again.”
I laughed and shook my head.
“No, I have a lot of money to spend. It’s because I have a lot of money.
I persuaded them many more times to let them go shopping unconditionally.
Now, I don’t want to argue with my parents about the civil service exam, so after I settle down better in this field, I’ll give you more money than I can give you for a part-time job. I was thinking of giving it as pocket money when I grow up.
Before the day of parting that comes to anyone, whether it’s parents, a lover, a relative, a friend, or whoever it is, today was a day I wanted to do well for my precious person.
