Chapter 127 – Enough (1)
Let’s choose to be happy.
As if a horse had a hook, it hung over its head and circled.
Sometimes there are things you need to say to notice.
Things that are too obvious, so close to the eyes that you can’t even notice them.
I need to pat him on the back and wake him up from the side, but I know he didn’t see it.
Now he did
The current choice is not happy.
It’s so obvious, but it’s more touching when you say it.
“…”
However, there is no answer as to how to make a different choice.
Just knowing that I had to change made my head feel lighter.
Starchis gets up from his seat like Stion.
“Are you going back?”
“Yes.”
I haven’t had time to talk to him yet.
As soon as it was said that there was no advice, the business here came to an end.
The choice is yours alone.
I still wanted to think more about it.
It was still daytime, but I wanted to rest.
The day was long.
****
Starchis returned to his quarters.
There was a lot of work to be done even in the middle of a complicated head in many ways.
You have to go and say hello to the receptionist, Marshall.
You have to go and talk to Rose or Heian.
He could not predict when he would be able to rest without thinking or worrying.
It just seemed like a very old thing.
Starchis entered the inn with many complicated thoughts.
While I was about to return to the lodging on the upper floor, there was a person I could see.
Thoughts are broken by her presence her, and her steps her stop.
“…Russ.”
Black-haired black-eyed.
Russ was sitting at some table.
She wondered if she had many things on her mind too,
I came to my senses at Starchis’ call and looked at him.
“…”
She got up from her seat and came over.
His black black hair His shone like silk.
“…I waited.”
She says.
The reason Russ waited here was obvious.
There was nothing but party disbanding.
If it had been for any other reason, it would have been rather surprising.
When talking about dissolution at the time,
Russ was surprised and answered some words,
Stachis left before he could hear her.
Her head was complicated and she couldn’t stand it.
What the party members have been lying about.
Mother and father work.
Something I almost died.
Party disbanding.
The day of Lily’s complete breakup.
Awakening of the saintess of Vienne.
I didn’t have a single thing sorted out, but I couldn’t stay to hear the answer as my worries poured out.
“…Let’s talk…Chis.”
Even if I’m getting better by talking to Stion now,
It didn’t change much.
Still complicated,
There were many things to think about.
I couldn’t afford it.
“…Give me time, Russ.”
Starchis speaks before she can say anything.
“…Uh?”
As if she hadn’t expected an answer.
Make a surprised voice
Even the approaching steps stopped,
She looks at him with sad eyes.
It seemed that he still did not understand exactly what he meant.
She was wondering if she should say what she wanted to say.
“…Do you want time?”
“I’m worried too.”
“What?”
“…”
When he doesn’t answer, Russ takes another step.
“…What are you thinking about, Chis?”
“…”
“The party…We won’t disband…?”
She asked with her hopes.
In an instant, everything is lost.
His lover’s place, his friend’s place, his side his.
The lover is Elsaine or Rose appears,
His friend’s place his is exposed to lies,
Listening to the story of the party disbanding by his side.
It was all brought up by himself.
It was hard for her to say anything about him,
However, he did not want to wait for the doom to come quietly.
“…”
As the story seemed to be getting longer, Starchis sat down at a random table.
When I entered the room, it seemed that the story would flow strangely, just like it was with Lily.
He sat down, and Russ followed.
She pretended to be calm,
I was more scared and nervous than ever.
I thought that the conversation from now on could decide the future, so it was impossible to stay calm.
“… Russ.”
He calls her
“…Yes.”
She also answered quietly.
And he asked in a weak voice, just like a long time ago, when the two of us were stuck together while working as kingdom guards.
“Why should we…Be gatherers…?”
He asked her why she hadn’t been able to find it yet.
Perhaps he wanted a convincing answer.
Russ was too difficult from her first question.
I didn’t know what to say to satisfy him.
“…Doing such a risky thing… I don’t even have the will, so why should I do it?”
“…”
No longer did Starchis seem to be asking her to blame her.
Really, he too wanted the answer now.
Starchis usually asked two people if he had any concerns.
Stion, or Russ.
Stion couldn’t answer, so this time he was asking Russ.
Russ said her mouth twitched.
It was difficult to tell whether it was acceptable or not.
With an honest answer.
Because she loves him
That alone was reason enough for Russ to do such a risky thing.
“…”
She pondered and swallowed her words.
There was a reason she couldn’t speak.
‘I love you, so you stick with us who have given you pain over and over again.’
She couldn’t say that.
I could n’t say it, but it was her honest feelings of her, so I could n’t bear to see the party disband.
When she doesn’t answer, Stachis says.
“…Is not it. I mean, I don’t know either.”
“…”
“Ha… Russ. What should we do?”
“…”
Stachis vomited with a troubled face.
“You became a gatherer because of me. So, whenever you get hurt in the future… Whenever something happens, I have no choice but to feel guilty… You suffer because you want me. Hurt because you want me She passed the risk of dying because she wanted me… Is this right?”
Russ made the same expression as Starchis.
She looks at him with a darker face, then lowers his head, and finally looks at Starchis with determined eyes.
And she tells him over and over again.
Russman always knew how to be honest with him.
“… It’s better than falling with you. The moment I fall with you… My life loses its meaning.”
“…Haha.”
The more I look at it, the deeper it is, and perhaps the more heavy it is.
Stachis, who had never received such love, felt unfamiliar or awkward about it.
He didn’t want to talk any more.
“… Go back, Russ.”
“..However-“
“Russ. Give me time to think.”
Starchis got up and went upstairs without waiting for Russ to reply.
Russ just watched his back her as he left.
****
Several days pass.
Stachis lay on the bed, putting aside everything else and contemplating.
When he said he was worried, he only remembered the sad faces of the party members.
Still, it couldn’t be like that today.
A call came from the church.
It was Bien.
To be precise, they were acquaintances from Bienne.
… Since she promised to become her saint, it was a call to come and say hello to her.
****
When I came to the church, there was not much difference.
Everyone was as usual.
Some apprentice saints swept the yard,
Some laundry carried and moved.
A few walked around with bloodstained clothes and tired faces as if they had just returned from the medical center.
Starchis was focusing on them without major changes.
People who didn’t really care
As of today, I have come to focus on the fact that there is no change.
He looked at them, but his steps did not stop.
I heard where Bien is.
He walked into the church.
And Casey suddenly appeared in front of him and blocked him.
“…It’s Starchis.”
“…A friend from Bien.”
Starchis was not taken aback when he saw Casey who quickly blocked his way.
I was expecting something like this to happen at least once.
“My name is Casey.”
Casey put his hands in front of her and bowed politely.
Starchis also bowed briefly and asked politely.
“How about Vienne?”
“… Follow me.”
Apparently, she had been waiting for him.
Her own friend she became a saint,
There will be one or two things you want to say.
…And to be honest, I wondered if Vienne had told her a lot.
Seeing that her original heart her is weak, it reminded me of how she would have told many stories to her friend her Casey.
Casey, who had heard her story of her, would have come up with the words she longed for.
Judging from her hardened face her, it didn’t seem like a very positive story.
Starchis waited for her to speak her first.
But for a while, the two walked without speaking.
Is she worried
Or maybe she was organizing her words by putting the Starches in front of her, she didn’t know.
It wasn’t until she went inside the church, between rooms and up the stairs, that she opened her mouth.
“…What happened in the rain… “
“…”
“Can you please tell me..”
“… Didn’t Bien talk?”
And Casey shook her head.
Bien said she didn’t seem to say anything.
Stachis came as a surprise.
Bien said that she always had a hard time with herself.
When she had a problem, she always told him.
Bien also said that she told her friends about her troubles her.
Her friend her, she would have said then, would have been Casey right in front of her.
But at least this time, it seems she didn’t talk about it.
“…Don’t say anything.”
Casey went up the stairs and in the middle she stopped.
“…Without crying. You don’t secretly take me anywhere…! They say nothing.”
“…”
“I’m still with blank eyes, as if I’ve lost my way to speak.”
Starchis secretly bit his lip.
He let out a shallow sigh through his nose, trying to control his mind her.
“…It’s the first time I’ve seen something like this… I’ve known it my whole life… It’s the first time I’ve seen anything like this.”
She turned and looked at Stachis.
Rather, she was one or two steps above her, so her eye level her was right.
I saw Casey’s frowning eyes in her.
“Then I opened my mouth yesterday, do you know what I said?”
“…”
“They said they would do her saintess of her. You promised.”
Starchis couldn’t look her in the eyes of her.
Turn her head slightly to the side.
“…Why are you doing this, Bien?…Yes?”
She had nothing to say to her.
Just as Bienne couldn’t tell her, she couldn’t tell him either.
“… Where is Bien?”
Put aside all questions for a moment.
He had come to see Bien now.
How it would end could only be known when they met.
****
When Starchis enters the room,
I saw a woman sitting at the far end of the room, staring at the wall.
Silver hair.
Small body.
No black clothes today
She was wearing a pure white dress.
It was Bien.
She must have heard him coming in.
Still, she didn’t look back.
He stood firm, still.
Starchis quietly closed the door and stood still.
“…”
“…”
Over the past few days, the atmosphere has changed a lot.
But Stachis knew.
It was just smoke.
After seeing Bien for a long time, he could see that she was determined to pretend to be strong.
She who always showed herself what she saw,
In her false guise she was covering herself up and pretending to be strong.
It was her actions that made it more realistic that the relationship between the two would end here.
“…”
Starchis thought about what to say.
This was right
Even thinking about countless nights, this is true.
Because he cannot be like his father,
I can’t reciprocate their hearts,
Because they feel unrequited
There is no reason to risk your life.
If you hold on to the moment,
You will be able to praise yourself later for making the right choice.
Starchis walked towards her, her pure white her from her head to her toes.
The sound of his footsteps echoed across the stone floor.
The closer he gets, the harder it gets for Bien to pretend to be strong.
He tilted his head slightly forward.
The more she sees her, the more Stachis feels heavy.
When he took a step behind her,
Bien had her head her fully bowed forward.
“… She said she decided to become a saint.”
In the end, Stachis, unable to find anything to say, says what he sees.
Bien lifted her bowed head straight again,
He still doesn’t look at Starchis and says.
“Yes.”
It was a determined voice.
“I will do it. Starches.”
I expected this future,
I didn’t know that she would change like this all at once.
Sister Helen, whom she had met a few days before, said that she would respect her will her in Bien.
It wasn’t like there was pressure from anyone.
This would literally have been Bienman’s promise her.
“..I was thinking?”
“…”
“…When I’m around, you… Just seem to get sick.”
Stachis was glad she wasn’t looking at him.
He didn’t have to hold back his expression too hard.
“..Did I hurt you too much? Lies and bullying.”
“…There were also many good memories.”
“…You don’t have to lie.”
“Really.”
Vien’s trembling breathing caught a glimpse.
Then I took a deep breath and
Again, speak in a calm voice.
“…I did a lot to be forgiven for the sins that plagued you.”
“…”
“But I guess it wasn’t enough. It was to the point that you, who were so kind, were so angry…Of course, that wasn’t enough.”
“…”
“I think that’s why she became a saint like this. Take care of countless people and repent.”
“Bien.”
“So I am fine. I have to pay for my mistakes.”
Starches thinks.
This wasn’t Vienne.
Still she pretended to be strong.
“…I’m okay..”
Starchis wanted to hear her true intentions her.
He took a step
He had to see her face her.
“Do not come…!”
As he takes a step, Bien is still small, but she speaks in the loudest voice he has ever spoken.
Starches was ignored.
I move a few more steps and stand in front of her.
“… Bien.”
“..Uhhh.. Black..!!”
Her face her was a mess.
Her tears her seemed to last a long time.
It seemed that she had been crying ever since she turned around.
And from the moment she saw Stachis’ face her,
She put down everything she had pretended to be strong and started crying again.
She raised her hands and cupped her face her, sobbing.
“..Me…! I don’t want to…! You don’t like me..!”
Let’s choose to be happy.
Stion’s words linger.
This was far from happy.
Rather, in this way, she herself is no different from her father her.
Unhappiness and tears are shed on every road.
Every choice he makes hurts others.
If so, why the hell did he declare that he would be different from his father his?
Anyway, in this way, it’s just the same as him.
– Papak!
Bienne didn’t care that her own clothes her were messed up, and she flew in and hugged Stachis.
She wraps herself around his waist his and continues to weep in her arms his.
“Starchis… I’m scared… I… I’m not that great..!”
Her voice breaks something in her head.
He thinks
Okay. That’s all I had to do.
A thought I heard many times in this intense conflict.
I just had to do this.
Even when she first tried to pretend to have a girlfriend, thanks to the thought that she had enough,
The reason why his relationship with Rose had progressed was because he thought it was enough.
The choices he made behind these thoughts always brought him joy.
This time he begged for it.
In any case, such calculations are unnecessary.
Now is the time to do whatever you want.
Let go of thoughts about the future.
I didn’t want to do this anymore.
I didn’t want to hurt others anymore to keep my stupid promise.
Especially if they are important people.
There are many people who would be happy if they only bend themselves.
Loving a lot of people…Will not work yet.
But just because you can’t do it, it’s not the way to cut it all out.
He warmly wrapped the back of Bien’s head her.
She is started
“Bien.”
“…Uh..?”
“..Saint.. Don’t you want to?”
Bien hesitated at his question her,
She honestly nodded her head in his arms.
“…Do not want to do it…”
Starchis also nodded at her words her.
“..Don’t do it then.”
