Chapter 1018 – #100. Utopia (3)
“You’re human too, right? “It’s interesting to see that you suffer from depression.”
“Isn’t that something you should say to someone who is depressed?”
“Fuhuhu! Do I not know you? If she’s her older sister, she’ll be able to get through it. “You’re a strong person.”
She laughs, asking if it makes sense that Lee Seon-ju can’t overcome depression, but she is at a loss for words.
“I know. “If you can’t overcome depression, you’re not Lee Seon-joo.”
Her younger brother was not too worried about her depression because he was well aware of her behavior.
“Isn’t it because administrative work isn’t a good fit? “Why don’t you just retire like me and relax?”
“Even if I don’t, I’m thinking about it.”
“Really? Great! It’s not bad to spend your leisure time simply farming. There are times when I feel bored, but that too is a luxurious feeling in its own way.”
A young day when I spent each day without knowing how the day passed.
Retirement itself is a luxurious life that cannot be enjoyed easily, and living leisurely is no different from spending time in luxury.
“But I’ve been busy my whole life, so it’s awkward to take a break.”
“If you are my sister, you deserve it. How much trouble did she go through to create a utopia? She gave all her youth. Just retire like me. “I’ll keep playing with you so you don’t get bored.”
“Aren’t you just holding on to me because you’re bored?”
“Oh, I got caught.”
“Maybe it’s because I’m not used to administrative work yet. “Wouldn’t it be okay if you get used to it?”
“You think it feels like burnout?”
“Huh. “Right now, I think resting would actually be poisonous.”
I needed something to focus on.
“It’s a shame. “I was happy because I thought I could play with my sister now.”
I chatted excitedly with her younger brother and drank a little of her luxury.
The day spent with her close brother seemed to have helped her mental health so much that she had no major problems when she returned to her administrative work the next day.
However, her depression was not going to go away as easily as she thought.
She seems to be trying to be her shadow, but she keeps disappearing from her side and then suddenly pops up.
As time with her depression continued, she began to think that even the depression might be a part of her.
As she got older, her old body became increasingly difficult to move, and her stiff head became difficult for her to do her administrative work.
Her life was slowly being eaten away by depression.
One day I realized that I had made a huge mistake with the administrative work I had been holding on to until the end because I couldn’t give up.
Seonju Lee got to meet ‘him’ in person.
Because she first asked to meet her there.
“Mr. Seonju?”
“… “It’s been a while.”
The moment Lee Seon-ju saw him, her strength completely disappeared.
She said that she was old, and her wrinkles were wrinkled, but this person maintained his old appearance, as if he had returned to the past.
I knew for a long time that he was special, but I got goosebumps when he saw such a ridiculous difference.
“Do you understand why I don’t do many external activities?”
“I had no idea there would be this much of a difference. “Looking at you makes me feel like I’m back in the past when I was younger.”
“I was the only one who escaped time. At first, I avoided it because I wasn’t used to it, and then I avoided anything that was too different because I thought it could be scary.”
Even I, who knew how special he was, got goosebumps to this extent, so I wonder if other people were appalled.
I could also understand why people were so anxious to deify him.
“I think it makes even more sense that you are not God.”
“Haha, are you going to do this too? “He’s the one who saw how shitty I was.”
“Have you ever been a prick?”
“There was. “Have you done anything because you’re afraid of sex?”
“That happened some time ago.”
“It’s a pretty big dark story for me.”
Didn’t he eventually do what he hated so much for the sake of the future of utopia?
In her memories, he was never a prick.
She shared her thoughts honestly.
“Ah. Everyone else knows that.”
But the man didn’t seem to have any effect on her consolation.
“At least it was a good memory for me. So don’t blame yourself too much.”
“Hmm, I heard that I made a mistake this time, and it caused a lot of damage.”
“It wasn’t a big enough problem for you to step forward. The training is over and all that remains is for me to retire.”
I am now at the age where I need to rest.
It’s not her own choice, and people around her won’t allow her to work.
He was no longer in a state where he could work.
It took me too long to realize that.
Thanks to this, I caused great inconvenience to other friends.
“I have prepared things so that you can live comfortably even after retirement. Whatever I have prepared, it will be far less than the efforts you made for utopia.”
“Thank you. You could have asked someone else to do it, but you were considerate of me by telling me directly, right?”
“It’s more about respect than consideration. Because I think we can have the utopia we have today thanks to you.”
“Those are nice words. Thanks to you, I think I can retire with peace of mind.”
It was a greater comfort than I thought to know that someone who was the heart of utopia recognized my hard work.
“And actually, I came because I had something else to say.”
“What do you want to say?”
“Um… I have a favor to ask you.”
“I’m asking you a favor?”
Who would dare do such a big thing.?
“I need to explain a few things in advance to tell this story. I was worried because it was a dark story for me, but I couldn’t wipe my mouth after receiving the gift.”
“… Tell me.”
“Like I said before, this is about a time when I was afraid of sex. My condition at that time was much more serious than you think.”
It seemed difficult to bring up the old dark history that had been wanted to be buried.
She couldn’t bear her confusion and listened intently.
There were a lot more embarrassing and confusing stories than I thought.
“Someone else came into your body, and that person had sex instead?”
“Of course I do it myself now, so don’t get me wrong.”
“So the night you spent with me was also done by an unknown person entering your body?”
“It is true that all the people who did it in the beginning did it when he came in.”
“…”
I’m at a loss as to how to react to this.
The body belongs to this man, but if the person inside it is someone else, then who on earth did she have sex with?
“I’m embarrassed.”
“It’s worth it.”
“Why did you tell me this now? If you were planning on offending me, you definitely succeeded.”
I felt like my good old memories had been trampled.
He said, unable to hide his displeasure.
“I didn’t plan on telling you either. Like I said, I had no choice because someone else asked me to.”
“Who is that person to ask me to do something like this?”
“This is the person who came into my body a long time ago and slept with you.”
“!!!”
“He said he would like me to ask you about your intentions when you completely lose your attachment to Utopia.”
“What are your intentions?”
“Won’t you come to my world?”
“… I don’t know what they’re talking about. I don’t understand.”
“I completely understand.”
There are many worlds in this world, and it was not easy to accept that the person who came into his body was also from another world.
“Are there no zombies in other worlds?”
“It may or may not exist.”
That meant there was a place that wasn’t there.
There is a world without zombies!
I was so frustrated that I was living in a utopia.
“Can’t we move to that world?”
“It’s impossible. Moving even one of you costs money. There’s no reason for that person to have to bear that burden.”
“…”
“And I’d rather get this world back on track than adapt to another world.”
If she had those thoughts, she couldn’t be more greedy.
“But why am I…?”
“You never had a romantic relationship with anyone else until you retired.”
“… Yes.”
“Do you plan on finding a lover after retirement?”
“You want me to find a lover at this age? Who on earth?”
This is nonsense.
And is it a relationship that lovers can create what they want to create?
“I’m too old. What would I do in a different world now? Thank you for the offer, but I think it would be right to decline.”
“I would have respected the doctor, but why not think again?”
“You want me to think again?”
“That person is similar to me. Just like I stay young, he also has a way to stay young.”
“Then I shouldn’t even go there.”
It’s only been a few nights.
I don’t even know what kind of face that person has.
But are you telling me to trust that person and move on to another world?
What should I do with this person who maintains the same youthfulness as this person?
“That person will give you your youth back.”
“No, it’s okay. He has no reason to do that, and I have no reason to enjoy that luxury. This may not have been an easy topic to bring up, but thank you for telling me. And tell him I’m declining the offer.”
It would be a lie if I said I wasn’t tempted by the promise of giving back my youth.
However, relying on memories from long ago and going to another world was not an easy decision to make.
If you go there, you won’t know anyone, so can you really not regret it?
‘It’s right to spend the remaining time here.’
Having suffered from depression for a long time, she was afraid of starting her adventure in an unfamiliar world.
When she was young, she was not afraid of adventure, but her old body always made her guess its limits.
So, it was natural to trust someone I didn’t even know and turn down the opportunity to go to another world.
“It would have been better if the offer had come from another young person instead of me.”
There are many people who are sick of the zombie world.
Perhaps her decision might have changed if she were a little younger.
But I didn’t want to do that now.
I no longer feel regret about working.
Even though she knew she had to leave when she clapped, she couldn’t do it, so she brushed it off without hesitation, as if her hesitation had been a lie.
The people who worked with her looked puzzled.
She was so scared of retirement, but when she actually tried it, she realized it wasn’t a big deal.
“What should I do now?”
The morning after I quickly organized everything and retired.
As soon as she woke up, she leisurely looked up at her ceiling and thought.
