Chapter 3 – 3 – Special Monster Destruction and Removal Team (Women Only)
The headband with a ponytail on the tail is a magical artifact. That function is called simple cross-dressing.
The moment I heard about him on the train, I thought the worst. Could it be that TENA sold me to a place that is difficult to express in words?
Tena Everright as employer and Thanh Bhan Thai as employee. This one-year contract contains nothing but our signatures and salary-related details, and there is not enough explanation to be suspicious.
Could it be that this is a ticket from hell to a brothel filled with customers with unique tastes?
But the truth that greeted me was a little more terrible than I imagined. I got off the cross-country train that I couldn’t even remember when I got on it because I was so drunk, and what caught my eye when I looked down at the campsite was…
“They’re all women?”
The people at the campsite far away are all women.
···What on earth have I gotten myself into?
“Don’t be scared. No one will easily find out that you are a man. You are using an illusion artifact that saves you the trouble of dressing as a woman.”
Are perception distortion artifacts alone enough? Eshen showed an eerie smile.
“Unless you have a bright nose like me.”
···I knew it.
An ominous picture is already forming in my mind. I go down like this, thinking that something is going to happen, and say hello to you, wishing you the best in the future, but for some reason, it turns out that I’m a man.
If you came into an all-female party pretending to be a woman, you would be asked what you were trying to do. There’s a high probability that you’ll get hit, and you’ll be lucky if you don’t get hit.
The thought of why I was kicked out of a previous party suddenly flashes through my mind. Even here, if something goes wrong, you can’t take it out or leave it and you end up perverting.
…But who would give me a down payment of 20,000 won? It’s not just the 100,000 debt I owe to that bastard Adamantone that’s on my back.
I have people I have to take responsibility for and support.
In today’s world, who would treat a porter like this and sign a contract? Are you crazy enough to give up?
You never know what will happen if you get caught. Are you crazy enough to pretend to be a woman?
A situation where both taking a chance and letting it go seem foolish. Whichever you choose, you may regret it.
Shit. If so, let’s collide.
At least it’s much better than the male prostitution trip I imagined earlier.
“By the way, is this really a party where all the members are women? How did it end up like that?”
“Why do you hate women?”
Do you think a camp full of female party members is worse than a guy trying to fuck me at a brothel?
Of course not. A little…No. It’s just very suspicious.
“It couldn’t have been made up of only women for no reason, right?”
“Have you heard anything from that sullen bastard?”
A combatant is a gloomy son of a bitch to a [Hero] Trait holder. Questions about the identity of this party deepen.
Didn’t you hear anything? Honestly, I’m not sure. I think Tena said something.
I heard it, but I don’t remember it. Or maybe she didn’t bother to explain to me that there was more alcohol than water in her body.
She walked down to the Eschen encampment and motioned for me to follow.
“The reason our party is all women is purely because of the issues between men and women.”
For a moment, time and space were distorted, and my lips trembled.
‘Is it a conflict between men and women? Women’s liberation? ‘It’s not like that, is it?’
A question that almost jumps out in fear. Fortunately, I was able to hold my breath just before I spit it out.
There was definitely something odd about the Tena I remember. She has a way of thinking that others cannot even guess.
But she didn’t like to ruin other people’s lives. Because she’s quirky doesn’t mean she’s evil.
They probably wouldn’t have thrown me, a man, into the middle of an ideological struggle. No way···.
As I was thinking about how to say it back, Eshen smiled.
“It’s similar to the reason porters are ostracized. Because fights arise over love issues.”
“Yes?”
The Institute of War, where intellectuals from all over the continent gather to study ways to eradicate evil in the world.
The sex ratio of the ‘combatants’ in the warrior party announced by the War Society is approximately 7 to 1. Of course, since it is manual labor, the male ratio is 7.
So, for example, let’s say there are 7 male combatants and 1 female combatant in a party.
According to statistics from the Institute of War Studies, in this case, the survival rate of seven male combatants is extremely low.
Because the skills of the only female combatant are low?
No. Whether you fight well or not, the results are the same.
“Because when seven men try to protect one woman, the number of avoidable injuries increases.”
I frowned at Eshen’s explanation.
“No way.”
“It’s an instinct. Males want to protect females and children. What can we do if humans are born that way?”
“Does this mean that mixed genders are not suitable on the battlefield? No matter how strong an individual’s combat power is?”
“Of course, there are kingdoms that recruit female soldiers, but we are not a regular army.”
Although they may be regular troops who get kicked in the shins by their superiors if they care about a comrade’s genitals, a hero party is a free-spirited fighting group that has its own differences from the gathering process to the goals.
No matter how much the female warriors screamed at them not to take care of me, the male warriors were so upset that they couldn’t help but reflexively wrap their arms around me.
“Ugh, I’ll take this arrow instead. You go back to your family alive… That’s pretty much it. But what if the woman secretly enjoys the attention from the men? Or, the man wants to receive more than a thank you in return. What if the problem becomes more serious as the number of party members increases?”
If a romantic relationship is added to such a situation, there is a high probability that the party will end in disaster.
Among the numerous problems that can arise due to sexual desire, it is the most decisive factor that brings us closer to annihilation.
It is a fight between colleagues who can share hardships but cannot share affection.
The barbarian warrior’s ax flies next to the warrior’s ear. The warrior summons the thief and uses the power of the family to fight him. The poisonous frog juice that the thief cherished for hunting magical beasts goes into the priest’s water bottle, and the priest curses in the name of God that the barbarian warrior’s balls will fall off.
The female wizard who created the great disaster while enjoying everyone’s affection, shrinks from her bloodier atmosphere and quietly runs away to the Magic Tower…
The party that went through such a shy and cute commotion, even if they return safely with their lives, their friendship cannot survive.
“It’s a battle for affection.”
Eshen Taiga solemnly added to me, who was sick of realistic scenarios.
“For the sake of fairness, I would like to add that even women break each other’s heads when they fight over men.”
“I see. I didn’t want to know.”
“Anyway, that’s why the ‘Frontline Party’ unifies the genders. Men are with men. Women are with women.”
“That sounds a bit reasonable. Could be – wait, what?”
“Precious power should not be wasted in a love fight. We are one of the ten hero parties that are on the front line in the fight against monsters.”
“Wait!”
I stopped at the entrance to the campsite and asked, blinking my eyes as fast as the wind.
“This is the ‘front line’ party? The ‘front line’ I know?”
A party that clashes with the Demon King’s army at every turn and takes charge of hunting down giant monsters?
“Or what?”
I looked up to see the camp flag waving majestically.
‘Special Monster Destruction Removal Party’.
There is a name written that makes you feel alive. Just as Eshen said a moment ago.
There is a list of requests hanging next to the entrance. The content is creepy.
〈… Mission to destroy the headless knights ‘Durahan’, the three knights who blocked them were unable to fight… 〉
〈 One-eyed giant ‘Cyclops’ attack team recruitment, height 20 meters, danger scale S… 〉
“Can we negotiate salary again?”
I said calmly. While crying inside for help.
“I think I need to receive more than 20,000 in advance. Where is the party leader, Tena Everlight?”
“Our hero is busy. He’s gone to take care of other S-class work. He’s the head of a party and he’s competing alone. You’ve done well. Very.”
Eshen twitched his lips and frowned as if he didn’t like something.
“And you are already mine.”
“Yes?”
I asked back blankly. What do you mean ‘mine’?
Could this be a sudden confession? Or, is your side job a slave trader? Considering that we were not acquaintances, the slave trader is a bit more plausible.
While I was sneaking away, Eshen ripped a request form from the list. And with his other hand, he suddenly grabbed the lapel of my waist.
Before I could say anything, my feet rose in the air. The moment I screamed in my heart and covered my head,
I realized that I was being held in Eshen’s hands like a luggage bag.
“What are you doing?”
“Going back to the train. To process the request.”
As his carefully placed leg dragged on the ground, Eshen pretended to kick it with his back foot.
I gently lifted my knees and went back into luggage mode.
“Wait a minute. Right now?”
“Okay, wait! Where are you going right now?”
A boyish, refreshing voice comes from behind. And then the female knight and elf jumped out and blocked Eshen’s path.
Thanks to their similar short stature as twins, it seemed as if the younger children were blocking their older sister.
“He’s the ‘new guy,’ Eshen? Isn’t he?”
“He’s the guy we were supposed to bring in in the first place! What do you think will happen if this gets into Tena’s ears?”
“…What is this all about?”
Eshen Taiga heaved and stretched her shoulders, then looked down at me and smiled toothily.
“Actually, I’m not your escort.”
“What are you doing now-“
“Your escorts were originally those naive guys. They were fools who would believe it when Thena pointed to the sun and said that was the moon. But, I can’t just take it as easy as them. ‘Porter’.”
The attitude of spitting out the word porter is not nice. I made a face.
“What do you mean?”
Eshen lifted me high. Light as a 5KG dumbbell.
Then, as I was horrified, he met my eye level and whispered softly.
“I don’t know what Tena was thinking when he brought this man in here. No matter what he does, he rarely asks for understanding from the party members before doing anything. But, the only way he disguised himself as a woman and tried to get him into the party was because he was a ‘porter.’ “Why?”
“How do I know that? You must have needed me…!”
Death seeps into Eshen’s eyes. The interrogation, ‘Don’t lie.’
I gritted my teeth and did not avert my eyes. It’s not just that there’s nothing to stab.
Tigris are humans born with the instincts of wild beasts. And if you turn your gaze away from the beast, you are more likely to be attacked.
A surprising smile spread across Eshen’s lips.
“I need to find out. What you are doing. I am going to resolve the request. You are my porter. I will watch you provide support and then judge.”
Judgment?
I understand what the context is without you having to say it. Prejudice against the profession of porter itself.
[Porter] There is a stereotype that guys with the aptitude for hitting on women go around.
I gritted my teeth. There is no such thing as a bully in the world. But···.
“I don’t know what they’re muttering, but newbies are not bags! Put them down where they are, Eshen!”
“That’s right. They’ve already punished us for leaving us in the kitchen storage room! Do you know how cold it was!”
The female knight and elf did evil. I looked at Eshen with dark eyes.
“Where did they lock you up?”
Could it be that I was mistakenly caught by a crazy person?
Eshen looked embarrassed, as if he had done something, and scratched his ears buried in his orange hair.
“Ah, why do you keep whining? You’re an elf. You know how to make fire with magic, right?”
“Fire? You sound like fire! Set fire to the warehouse? Are you crazy!”
“I was trapped for 72 hours in -10 degrees Celsius wearing only shorts! 72 hours! I’m going to tell Tena!”
“Early. You little kids can’t do anything without TENA.”
Eshen Taiga lightly pinched me against his side and closed his legs. As if about to leap.
I was possessed by a terrible premonition.
“Sleep-“
Eshen jumped into the sky. It went well over the heads of the two party members. And we landed in front of the platform of the train station we had walked down from.
Sensation of head being tilted violently. Blood pressure fluctuates in bone pain. It’s a scary power. I’ve always heard that Tigris is a superhuman, but I never thought it would be like this.
“Ugh. My stomach…”
“When you get motion sick, you throw up in the bathroom.”
Eshen walked into the car and let me go only after entering the train cabin.
Like throwing objects onto the seats in the cabin. I groaned at the unfriendly landing.
The transcontinental train is still stopped. He’s probably dropping off supplies needed for the party.
I glanced at Eshen, who stood up to go to the bathroom.
“The food on the cross-country train is not tasty. Do I have to take it?”
“Then do you want to go on foot? That’s fine with me. If a monster you meet deep in the mountains while walking bites you, there’s no need to test what you’re doing.”
What?
“···It is true that among those who work as porters, there are many who are just living their lives.”
“Of course.”
“But let’s be honest. What did I do?”
“What?”
“Do you hate me because the porters are being reckless? On the contrary, I hate people who judge me that way just because I am a porter. I have always done my best to serve the party members-“
Eshen neatly ignored it and closed the guest room door. The conversation is interrupted by muttering from behind the door.
“It’s noisy, and if you run away, you’ll be followed.”
Tigris’ finger pointed at the window and pointed at me.
“I’m a Class A combatant.”
And 5 minutes later, Eshen returned and saw that I was not in the room, and his eyes widened as if he knew that would happen.
“That’s how it appears. Suspicious porter. I didn’t think I could find him by smell-“
“The cross-country train carries all kinds of cargo. All kinds of smells are mixed together. It won’t be easy to find it with just your nose. And… It never ran away in the first place.”
Eshen shyly looked back at me, who was standing behind me.
“What? Were you there?”
I shrugged. The enormous burden hanging on my back was shaking.
Eshen frowned.
“···What is all that?”
“This is something to prepare to enrich your trip. Are you sure you wanted to go hunting monsters without any luggage?”
“Where did you get it from, and how did you get there so quickly?”
“With just your mission request and my porter’s license, I can commandeer travel supplies by the ton from the cargo compartment of the train. Don’t you know? Have you been traveling without a porter all this time?”
Eshen searched his pockets. Then she flinched and lifted her tail toward the sky.
Because the request disappeared. Of course. Because I swiped earlier.
Eshen was astonished as he returned the request I gave him.
“How?”
“Are you the only one who is Grade A? I am also a professional porter with Grade A industry credibility.”
The industry standard is the Porters’ Association, so it’s not a standard recognized by kingdoms like your fighters.
To be pickpocketed, piercing the sensitive senses of a sub-race. You must have been very surprised. I pointed at Eshen, who seemed a little discouraged, just like he did.
“Yes, I will correct your needlessly aggressive mindset the first time we meet.”
Eshen tilted his head at the declaration of a non-combatant who could not defeat a C-class, let alone an A-class, with his fists.
“How?”
“We will provide you with the best porter service of your life.”
