Chapter 36 – Unhealthy Esthetic_dmm, the Eyes Around Her Sting.
Unhealthy esthetic_ugh, the eyes around me sting.
I was told to wait in a seat until my number was called.
How long do I have to stay here…
The focused gaze stings.
Well, honestly, I’d be staring at a woman suddenly taking her clothes off in the middle of her so openly.
I wonder what kind of person you are
No matter how anyone looks at it, it’s just pervert. It’s not normal.
It’s a bit sexist, but the person doing that is a woman? I can’t help but look
You don’t see that?
And sure enough,
Gazes, gazes, gazes that pierce me as I sit down…
Feeling like a monkey in a zoo
At least in this waiting room, my social status seemed lower than that of a monkey.
Treated as subhuman.
Certainly, changing clothes openly in such a crowded place was not something normal people would do.
It wouldn’t be easy to treat such a vulgar pervert as a human equal to himself.
At least to the people here, I’ll look like an incorrigible pervert.
Men who do not try to hide their blatant intoxication at all,
The woman’s gaze, as if looking at filth, looked down from afar as if even touching it was dirty.
Barks a thin arc, an obvious sneer.
It smiles cruelly as if it has found a toy that is easy to handle.
All sorts of flirtatiousness, dirty talk, and occasional catcalling.
It seemed that he was no longer a person, but looked at him as a good sexual treatment target.
The waiting room, which had been quiet until just now, had a harsh and obscene atmosphere, at least for me.
That difference makes one’s own downfall come to light. The misery stimulates me even more.
The treatment and situation changed in an instant.
Is it because I’m so shrunken, or is it a rational judgment that’s actually happening?
All the noise around me feels like an approximation of ridicule, ridicule, or contempt directed at me.
To think of it as an excessive delusion of persecution, I, myself, have committed something myself, and above all, those eyes and the things I hear from time to time tell me that those thoughts are not my simple delusions.
I’m going to go to the middle of the day.
The lowest-ranking prey in a small society.
Since he is silently lowering his head, the reaction around him is getting more intense, perhaps because his fragile appearance has stimulated people’s sadistic psychology. Get intense
A blatant gaze beyond a glance,
Some of them were looking right in front of me.
A well-groomed elderly man, with sticky eyes full of desire not befitting his age, even when our eyes meet, he brings his face closer as if it is laughable.
The camera lens of the smartphone that you don’t even try to hide now, the click rupture doesn’t stop.
It felt like I had taken all the pictures I would have taken for the rest of my life today.
The filming sound that continues to ring like that…
As if he didn’t ask for my consent as the subject, he started filming openly without hiding it.
The whole body is taken here and there without anywhere to hide.
All parts of me are stuffed in every nook and cranny.
The skin was turning redder, like a maple leaf.
I’m not sure if this is because of shame or if it’s a flush of excitement from the current situation.
I am despised and ridiculed, but for some reason I enjoy it. Exciting.
It feels good to be insulted, to be despised, to feel like I’ve become a being so easily despised, to be degraded to something more miserable.
By making them aware of their position, by reminding them of their fall, the pleasure of falling, of falling,
I am glad to see myself unable to turn back.
The gaze and treatment of others cause shame, but even such shame is eventually seen as a sign of how far one has fallen.
Excessive shame and excitement are mixed, and I am confused whether I am excited because of shameful feelings or just myself.
It’s embarrassing, but it feels good
I don’t want to see it, but I want you to see it…
I want you to look at my tartar, my embarrassing appearance…
I was so ashamed that I wanted to die, but on the contrary, I was excited by the shame.
Those warm glares, those contemptuous gazes…
To show your misery,
In the image of myself reflected in those eyes, the shrunken, dwarfed self is embedded in my mind.
Continued selling,
If it continued like this, I couldn’t stand it any longer.
Right now, right here, I want to masturbate…
Feeling unbearable.
Shame, misery, and pleasure mingled, running amok.
My body is so hot that I can’t stand it.
It rises, no it burns.
My head is ripe with pleasure, I am dazed.
When he hesitates, his hands move.
Continuous plosives,
Let’s reveal an obscene, lewd appearance, more like a subject, to aspiring photographers…
Even though he is only wearing a thin pair of red hemp, he is hot with the heat from his body.
It seems to burn.
Sweat flows.
A burning lust.
In this gaze, like a very vulgar animal, I threw off this piece of cloth that was at least covering me,
Like a beast, falling and falling as soon as he fell, like a beast who only lusted after lost reason.
In this place where everyone is staring,
What if you masturbate as it is?
Throw off this obtrusive street clothes,
If you show your obscene appearance in front of everyone and masturbate…
Ah, then how will these people’s eyes change?
Than contempt?
A gaze that sees something incomprehensible?
A toy that can be handled at will?
If so, what will it really be like…
Curiosity,
And strong desires.
Whatever happens now…
Just greedy for these unbearable pleasures,
I pick up the bottoms that now have a large, visible stain on them.
Let’s take off this piece of cloth like this,
In front of everyone.
I try to realize the thoughts that came to my mind that have lost reason.
As if the situation that would result from this would be fine, he didn’t even care about that anymore.
In my overheated head, I’m sure there’s no room for such normal thinking.
Just as instinct leads, as desire desires,
More filthy, more obscene…
Obviously, of one’s own will, one tries to do something that no normal person would do.
Without orders, just according to one’s lustful nature, just as one desires
In front of so many people, she becomes naked, naked, and tries to stimulate her secret and lewd parts.
Truly like a beast, with raw feelings of lust for pleasure,
I tried to take off the clothes that were imperfectly covering my body.
When the softly descending hand, barely visible, the obscurely hidden cloth slowly reveals its flesh color,
“Customer 284, customer 284 who was waiting, please come to the counter.”
One step forward, one step forward…
Regret and relief.
It was just a difference, just a difference.
With the call, reason that had lost its way in an instant came back.
Find a place
… What were you about to do?
It was dangerous…
If only the call had been delayed a little longer like this…
Surely, even if something big that is hard to turn back happened, it would have happened.
The act of changing clothes in a place like this was obviously an absurdly bold act, but
The act I was going to do a moment ago, even that, is incomparable, literally the way of a beast, subhuman, livestock,
Relief.
But, if my number wasn’t called, and in the end, if I had acted as I thought…
Really… What could have happened.
ㅡ Creepy feelings,
I get goosebumps at the ending that might have been.
Just a little bit of regret
As I was called, I stood up and went to the reception desk.
In the meantime, the hem of the already stained clothes,
Dark stains down the lower abdomen, obviously blatant.
Perhaps because the material is translucent, the secret genitals are revealed.
I can feel the eyes around me.
I try not to avert my gaze as much as possible, and move forward in silence.
It’s only a distance of less than 5m, it’s a really short distance, but it’s very difficult to go that way.
No matter how much she sweated, the clothes that showed through her skin were wet with sweat, making her skin more visible.
It wasn’t even that it didn’t look like it was naked.
It seemed that the pieces of clothing had already lost most of their function as clothes.
In particular, the lower part was serious.
The lower abdomen, which was wet with a translucent liquid that wasn’t even sweat, honestly, seemed so easy to infer what caused it, and it clearly revealed my excitement in the midst of it.
With my face flushed, I tried to cover it as much as I could, but I couldn’t cover it all with my small hands, and of course, my appearance like that made me a good target.
A buzz, a shutter sound, a whistling sound
All you can do is pretend not to hear.
I desperately wanted to hide somewhere.
“Guest 284, the designated course is Special Course C. The period is 2 days and 1 night, and we will keep the clothes you brought until the course is over. All fees are paid by the person who applied, so no separate payment is required.”
Expressionless, calm words, extremely businesslike attitude,
However, there is a hint of contempt in his businesslike attitude.
In the cold eyes, it seemed that my stain was reflected between those blue eyes.
It seems like they’re shooting pervert, so I’m atrophied.
Even though I am a guest, I feel like I have to do as I am told.
Uh.
By the way, 2 days 1 night course?
Have you been doing hairdressing for that long?
What the hell am I supposed to do to spend the night here?
Special course C, I have no idea what will happen to me.
However, it must be clear that this is not a very normal thing when you see that they are subjected to this kind of rough situation from the reception desk.
To be honest, a shop that suddenly asks to change clothes at the front desk is not a normal shop…
Of course, I’m not a normal person who says I’ll do it again, but
2 days and 1 night in a store like this, really… What kind of fate do you get…
“It is the key. Go to the hallway and go straight ahead and another person will guide you.
Take the key
A classic-style key, the number 0037 was written on the key holder next to it.
Probably the room number, the direction the receptionist pointed at was a long hallway.
A really long hallway, a long hallway that I don’t know why it was twisted so long, it was so obvious that at least something insignificant would happen if I continued on like this.
2 days and 1 night is honestly too blatant.
What did you spend so much time doing?
It’s a creepy feeling.
The long corridors were, frankly, unsettling, but at least they looked better than standing still.
I can still hear the filming sound and gossip.
Hell before, hell behind.
If you keep going though, you’ll at least be able to run away from them…
As instructed, go out into the hallway.
Being a guide, honestly, it’s embarrassing to show others, but
Come now
A little resignation, and the excitement of exposure,
I proceed to the hallway with stained clothes, honestly not much different from what I am wearing.
A small drop of water falling somewhere,
Pop-
Knock-♡
Like the crumbs of bread that Hansel left on the floor to avoid getting lost in the fairy tale of Hansel and Gretel,
Little stains were carved into every path I walked.
A messy milestone…
Maybe someone will find out
Bottoms are already a mess.
I’m embarrassed.
I was just ashamed.
