Chapter 75 – Confinement (2)
She said she would wash up and left the room.
Her outfit is no different from when she came in.
However, a few pieces of clothing in her hands were indirectly proving that something had happened in this place.
In fact, the truth…Wasn’t that important at this point.
Whether it was making love in this room, or fighting fiercely while holding each other by the collar.
I was a person who existed but did not exist, and now my doctor could safely assume that she was in control.
If you ask me if I accept this situation, my answer is no.
I just wanted a normal life, not a life like this.
But sadly there was nothing I could do.
It seemed that there was only a life left to be controlled as a kind of puppet.
What’s even sadder is… No matter how hard I tried, there was no way to do it.
Quite a lot of it was free, but only the metal that still reveals its presence at my ankles existed as if to remind me not to forget the brutal reality.
She put her head on the pillow and lay down on the bed.
The sigh that comes out at the same time is a bonus.
I didn’t even want to look at her ceiling anymore, so I turned her head and started staring in the direction she came from.
Perhaps it was an instinctive act.
Instead of the ceiling and windows not doing their job, looking at the door that is still changing.
At least that was the only place in the room where change existed.
The room, which was terribly tidy, hadn’t changed anything for three weeks.
It was a luxuriously decorated room to anyone’s eyes, but to me it was no different from a dungeon with only desolate chains.
Something sparkled on the floor.
It looked like some kind of liquid, but I soon recognized its existence.
A ray of light came in from somewhere and passed through it, and it just looked disgusting to me.
It seemed that he had already been twisted somewhere from thinking that the part of himself that came out of his body was disgusting to himself.
It was a possibility.
The possibility of being many things in many ways.
Was it on purpose or did you really not know?
An act that I don’t know if it’s an eccentricity or proof of love.
Her eccentricity is now completely incomprehensible.
When she realized that in her heart she had changed from love to eccentricity, she really had nothing to say.
I laugh bitterly at the twisted love and help myself as I see myself gradually getting used to it.
I thought I should go to sleep.
It seemed like there were still many days left, but now it wouldn’t matter to me.
###
It was the weekend, so after taking a bath, she went to visit his father.
“What’s the matter?”
It was rare for others to see that she was hesitant about something.
In fact, she was the one who used to be like this when it was related to him, but her frequency was very low, so it was really rare.
“He’s refusing to talk to me.”
Hearing this, he sighed.
In a sense he wasn’t sure if he was sighing, but it was certainly not a pleasant thing to hear either.
Was it a sigh over the plan to become strange at the end?
He glanced at his daughter once.
She was about to say that she couldn’t do even one of these things, but when I thought about it, she didn’t do anything wrong.
It was because she had already succeeded in bringing him back.
I don’t know where things went wrong, but he didn’t want to ruin what was going on.
“Whoa… I got it.”
He tried to head upstairs with his motionless body.
He opened the door, thinking that he wouldn’t know how many decades it had been since he had been the one who made him move like this.
“Get ready soon.”
###
That day was something different than usual.
She didn’t change anything, and she didn’t let me go.
I could only see other people.
That person was none other than Hilbert, the head of the Fellowes family.
“I told you to do it in moderation, but I made a patient.”
He didn’t give a specific answer.
Because I couldn’t trust anyone in this family anymore.
Maybe he just didn’t want to have a conversation.
Patient…
The patient was right.
I was a patient with a broken heart.
“How are you?”
Do you know everything but pretend you don’t know, or do you really not know?
It didn’t matter either way.
If you knew, you were an accomplice, and if you didn’t know, you were incompetent.
He was also responsible for this situation.
As I thought about these things, my words also followed my thoughts.
“Don’t you feel anything when you see this?”
“Seeing you say that, it seems like you’re still fine.”
It’s okay.
Since when did the definition of okay change?
Maybe he wasn’t wrong.
On the surface, my life may not look so bad.
A life of good living with a beautiful wife in a nice house and doing nothing?
However, it was natural to feel uncomfortable if the emotion itself based on it started out with a twist somewhere.
All that remains is to either accept it and live with it or not accept it to the end.
There were only two options left.
It was something that could only end when someone was hurt.
“The reason I came today was no different, I heard that you closed the door to your heart.”
“I think there was a misunderstanding, but isn’t the time coming soon?”
“You have to clear up the misunderstanding and go. If you leave it buried, it will only fester.”
I decided to just watch as far as I could go.
Seeing me silently listening to him, he had a dejected expression on his face.
“Heh heh… It seems the misunderstanding has already piled up.”
He sighed once and then began to speak in a way that tried to persuade me.
“I also didn’t start out very well when I first got married.”
At some point he started telling his story.
It was a story about the married life of aristocrats who were so obvious.
I was just listening to him with the attitude that you should talk and I will listen.
The problem was one of his words.
“Isn’t good good? We have to live while understanding each other.”
The emotion I felt the moment I heard those words was not anger, but desolation.
I don’t know why I felt that way.
Now I don’t know how I feel either.
But one thing was certain.
I don’t know if they understand me, but I wouldn’t be able to understand in my lifetime.
I just decided to take this opportunity to ask about everything up to that point.
“The first time we saw it was last year.”
It’s already been a year, and it’s not a short relationship, but it’s not a long one either.
If it wasn’t for Seria, she would have a bond like that she wouldn’t have.
“At that time, when I was admitted to the hospital, he paid for my hospital bills.”
“I’ll just tell you now.”
“Why did you pay for it then?”
By this time, she had just begun to vomit all the questions that had been silent inside.
“At that time, I just accepted the favor without knowing anything, but thinking about it later, it was strange. No matter how morally responsible it is,
They don’t usually pay for hospital bills.”
“After I recovered, he gave me good suggestions after that.”
“I don’t know if it was because I did my job well, but even then I was grateful. The offer itself was a good one.”
Considering how many people at this age can receive such an offer, his proposal was truly unconventional.
“However…”
The problem was that this was the crux.
“When you made that offer to me…Was it really pure kindness?”
He listened to me silently, just like I did before.
I didn’t know if I was organizing my thoughts or just dismissing it as nonsense, but I needed an answer.
“Answer me. Was it really just a simple favor? No, I think I misunderstood the question. I don’t think a house like this would offer a favor for nothing in return.
What did you see that made you suggest this to me?”
He sighed once.
Is it really frustrating or is it just acting?
“Haven’t we talked about it before?”
He did give me an answer.
“It was because your thesis was really good.”
If you answered like that, there was nothing to say.
As he thought, I won the award and it has already been recorded in history.
“You won’t believe me no matter what I say, so I’ll tell you everything.”
“The letter of recommendation was arbitrary. But I did not put any pressure on you or anything like that. You received the award purely on your own merits.”
“That’s why we’ve been talking about marriage ever since.”
“Your reputation was something that was difficult to give up easily. Seria also seemed to like you, so from then on she was quick-witted.”
I don’t really know what the world of nobles is like.
But one thing seemed to know.
It was really dirty and a really nasty place.
“What kind of person in the world gets married this way?”
In a sarcastic way, he lifted the blanket and shook the chain on my leg.
“That’s one reputation and one chain, it seems like it’s really cheap.”
“Is that the answer?”
It was an ultimatum of sorts.
It meant that if you have nothing more to say, hurry up and let me go.
“Stop it at this point. If you finish now, I’ll just quietly move on.”
“I can’t do that.”
He looked out the window for a moment and then closed his curtains again.
Seeing that the sky was orange, it seemed to be evening.
“You seem very excited. Calm down and talk slowly.”
It meant rejection.
After saying that, he left the room.
He never said sorry until the end.
At first, I wasn’t expecting either.
Because everyone was on one side anyway.
