Chapter 41 – Happiness
The words used to refer to us have changed.
In fact, it would be correct to say that it was added.
It would be correct to say that the term used to refer to the current relationship changed because it was due to end sooner or later.
It was a time for the two of us and a space for the two of us.
I didn’t do anything special, but it was really comfortable.
After finishing class a little early, we just sat leaning on the bed and holding each other’s hands.
“Are you going back to school next semester?”
She asked.
“I have to. It’s been a while since I haven’t been.”
She still uses honorifics and when I ask why did I let go of the conversation, we originally tried to let each other go, but
It was according to her insistence that she would continue to call her teacher until the tutoring was over and put the words after that.
“What are you going to do after graduation?”
“I don’t know yet. I’m putting some effort into my graduation thesis, but I don’t know what will happen.”
She seemed to be thinking deeply.
“What are you thinking?”
“I think if we had met a little earlier, we could have gone to college together.”
There was no romance, but I remembered the saying that if you can still date in such an environment, it is no different than promising the future.
Who said
I think it was something I heard in passing.
Universities are originally tight, but did you say that there was only one 10 years ago in the case of the Jumun Department, which runs the best in tightness?
It just made me laugh.
###
As time passed, our contact surface became wider and wider.
Lips at first
Then the hand
From the moment we progressed to the upper body, there was no line given to us.
Eventually we got to the point where we were lying in bed together at some point.
However, it would be more accurate to say that she is lying on top of me.
The atmosphere was on the verge of crossing the last line, but it didn’t seem like the time had come yet.
Of course, it was hard to endure.
I don’t know if you haven’t experienced it, but the temptations that come in from time to time are really sweet, but deadly.
My image at school was me close to a machine that only studied, but I was also a person.
Looking back, I remembered my first time.
I didn’t even know why it was all of a sudden.
The time when each other took each other’s beginning.
Those days that should have remained as happy memories, but now remain as tragedies.
It would be nice if I could forget it neatly, but not being able to do that complicates my mind.
Did I get lost in thought too much?
She was staring right into my face.
“What are you thinking?”
She couldn’t bear to answer that she was a woman, so the moment she was speechless, she narrowed her eyes and said her words.
“Hmm…I’m in front of you and you’re thinking of another woman.”
How far can a woman’s senses penetrate?
I got a little goosebumps.
Of course, it was my fault, so I had no choice but to say sorry.
“Of course, I’m a person, so I can think. But in front of me, please focus on me.”
“Sorry.”
“Teacher.”
“Huh.”
“I want to lock it up. So that only I can see it for the rest of my life.”
I may have said it as a joke, but why did it sound so realistic?
It was only a little later that I found out that it could actually happen.
###
My relationship with him was developing.
There was no blockage or retreat, just slow and steady progress.
Of course, her attitude must have had a great influence on that.
Trying to match his opinions at all times probably contributed the most.
There were a few things that even she couldn’t tolerate.
One was once a woman.
Among them, women who express their feelings to him.
In her mind, the expression female, not a woman, was already being used, but externally, she was still a woman who knew how to keep her line.
Wasn’t there a recent example of that?
In fact, there was something more important than that.
It was a farewell
All links are broken
The moment he really leaves her, she will hold him back, excluding her everything.
Whatever method you use.
If you do it that way, he won’t understand right away and will get angry.
But sooner or later you will understand.
She, who had such thoughts above him, soon became languid.
His stomach, more comfortable than any luxury bed.
When I turned my head, I saw that he was thinking hard about something.
There was no way to know what it was, but an instinct came to her that she was a woman.
Because he had that expression and eyes every time the story of the fox came up.
So, he spoke as if he was floating.
Seeing that she couldn’t say anything, her own intuition was clear.
How could she think of someone else with someone like herself in front of her?
She just couldn’t understand.
So a little warning was needed.
I wanted to block even my thoughts, but it was certain that I would receive a backlash if I went that far.
I decided to leave it as a last resort.
“I want to lock it up. So that only I can see it for the rest of my life.”
The sound of my heart came out of my mouth on its own.
She was taken aback by the involuntary action, but luckily he seemed to take it as a joke.
I thought so at first.
Even if there is an obstruction next to you, you have come this far in the end, but will there be anyone who will stop you in the future?
However, it was always forbidden to be careless.
Now, few people have recognized his worth.
Even that was all gone.
But one day it will appear again.
She was the one who thought she would have to develop her own powers to do that.
Did they say that all history is made on the bed?
In a way, that wasn’t wrong.
###
What used to be a contract job has become a full-time job.
Of course, it was a figurative expression.
Since she was also in a position to prepare for the new semester, she and I went to school to prepare for her return to school at the same time.
It’s a thought that sometimes comes to my mind, but when I really graduate, I wonder if I should go far away.
The past, which I could call memories, was already covered with ink.
It was really frustrating to see places that brought up painful memories every time I saw them.
But all I could do was let go.
If you follow a familiar road and head to a familiar place, you will find a familiar administrative office.
It was a place I hadn’t come to often before, but thanks to that, I felt like I was back as a freshman.
“Hello.”
Talk to the administrative staff.
“What did you come for?”
“I want to apply for reinstatement.”
“Your name?”
“Edward Weiss.”
It was the employee who heard my name and started to rummage through the piles of paperwork.
The employee started looking around, but asked me if it was not coming out well.
“When is the admission year?”
“Year 641.”
Since it was now year 646, it had already been five years since he entered school.
Of course, for the last few years, I didn’t go to school at all, so I actually only went to school for three and a half years.
The clerk pulled out a document and immediately began examining it.
“Edward Weiss…Is the professor in charge Rosalyn Erennis?”
“Yes.”
After recording this and that, the staff smiled and said that it was all over.
“It’s all over. You’ve been resting for quite some time, right?”
I know it’s a courtesy, but it was always burdensome for people to ask about personal circumstances like this.
“I have some work.”
With an artificial smile, he answered just like that and turned around and left.
I arrived at the entrance of the building, but it took me something to get back to my room.
Shouldn’t I still be talking to the professor?
Even if he was going up now, he was a very busy person, so I didn’t know if I would be able to meet him, but I decided to go.
He climbed the stairs thinking about it.
After going up and down for several years, I felt like I could walk around with my eyes closed now.
He stood in front of the room he frequented and knocked on the door.
‘Come on in.’
At the same time as the voice heard, I turned the doorknob and applied force to open the door.
“Who…Ah.”
“Excuse me.”
The professor had nothing to say.
Like someone who knew it was me who would come in.
“What’s the matter?”
“It’s nothing different, I think I should inform you that I’m going to go back to school next semester.”
The word “You’ll find out anyway” Came back, but that was for the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd years that had no effect on graduation.
For me, who had graduated, that was not the case.
The professor seemed to have a lot to say, but he didn’t say much.
“Are you feeling okay?”
“It has improved a lot.”
“Is the tutoring over?”
Even the professor, who seemed to be talking about his usual story, was a bit surprised by my answer to this question.
“I’m still doing it. I’ll probably do it until next semester.”
“Yeah, well, if it were you, you’d be fine.”
After a bit of chatter, the conversation came to an end.
“Then see you later.”
“Yes.”
Left the building
A sigh came out involuntarily.
Can we go back to our daily lives now?
Actually I didn’t know that. I just wish I could.
The sun was falling over the horizon.
