Chapter 503 – 17. Oberon’s Sword, Lilia, the Mysterious Swordmaster Whose Identity Is Unknown.
“Lilia… “
The voice of a man full of clumsiness.
Her will to make a decision is slowly crumbling, yes – like sand that is often trampled.
It shouldn’t have been like that. This feeling shouldn’t have happened, so Lilia asked back firmly.
“Tell me.”
Even though I know what he will answer, there is something I want to hear from him just in case.
Lilia fully captured the man in front of her with her narrow, trembling eyes.
“Of course, it will be difficult.”
“Ha… “
The realistic answer opens her heart and fresh air seeps into her lungs.
Unlike her body, which feels refreshed and light as if she were free from the stuffy clothes, the area around her eyes becomes crazy heavy.
I knew you would say that, but I didn’t expect that answer.
As she tried to appear calm and smiled, her wound opened and blood began to flow. As she wiped away the clear blood that flowed down her cheek with the back of her hand, her man wiped Lilia’s cheek with the back of her hand and said,
“But in the end, it’s not a simple matter like I don’t like you, Lilia. Because I made a promise to my women. We decided to be together for the rest of our lives… “I promised.”
“Ha, I guess so.”
I don’t want to get carried away, so the words I blurt out turn into arrows and fly back. Perhaps she spoke too coldly? Before Lilia could think about it, Cassano swallowed her emotions and spoke calmly.
“I guess asking you to join us is too much to ask, right? “Is it my greed?”
‘It’s soggy.’
The rough hand of her man gently caressing her cheek as she repeated the question several times.
Lilia spoke coldly as her man gently caressed her wounded hands after training countless times and recently plowing through rough bushes and tree branches.
“Hand… Take it off.”
If things continue like this, I feel like I’m going to complain, I feel like I’m going to lean into this warmth – If it doesn’t hurt me, I can hurt her even more, Lilia resolutely refused his touch.
‘Squishy… There… ‘
It was definitely the answer I wanted, and it was definitely the affection I wanted.
He was looking at himself, but he was not looking at himself. Just like when he projected the women who were complaining the same way, persuaded them, and embraced them – he must have thought of himself as an obstacle and intended to overcome it.
Let’s throw away her personal feelings about Cassano and think of the Cassano she knows as the focus of her character.
If she was going to fall for such kindly packaged foolish words, she didn’t want to fight like this.
“Okay. “It’s an unreasonable request.”
Fu-huu, seething frustration and sorrow – the meanness of accepting complaints, the hatred towards one’s ugly self for pouring out one’s anger at such a man.
Lilia swept away all her emotions in one sigh and revealed her true feelings with her calm tone.
“I thought you… “I feel like my head is going to explode just by imagining him holding and loving another woman and seeing her fussing – kissing another woman, hugging another woman – coming back to me at night and hugging me.”
Ah, I’m sure I’ll get sick of this woman.
Lilia swallowed her saliva from the anger that was so sticky and base that she let it out. This is a world where it is natural to be loved by many people. Whether she allows it or not, it is a world where such love is already allowed.
But if she says no, is Cassano obligated to give up all her love and choose her?
Of course there wasn’t, so Lilia scratched her disheveled hair with her hand and spoke out her inner thoughts.
“… Actually, it didn’t matter what happened before. Because it had nothing to do with me, it wasn’t me.”
“But not anymore.”
“You came into my heart as you please… There are other people too, is that okay? Can you care? “What kind of bullshit is that?”
‘Ah, idiot.’
The expressionless face becomes distorted and the wound opens. Blood flowing out of an uncontrollably gaping wound.
No matter how much you wipe, transparent water droplets flow down as if a dam has collapsed.
I wanted to speak in an adult, adult-like, rational manner.
Lilia wiped her hazy eyes with the backs of her hands and whined like a child.
“I-I don’t know anything about that… “
“The person I like… Even though he teases me every day, he smiles playfully, cares about me, and stays by my side… “
“You want to have me, but you don’t even have the courage, so you greedily take the opportunity and throw it away… She says she loves another woman and doesn’t want to see her tangled up even if she dies… !”
“… “
“Am I strange? Cassano, I wish you would only look at me. Ah, yes, I suddenly wonder why I am like this!”
“Just, just! As we stayed together, things got better! So, I just want you to look at me… “Is this heart my greed?”
No, everyone who wants to be loved has the desire to be exclusive.
I hope you only look at me and love only me. All humans are born with such emotions.
In Cassano’s view, Lilia’s feelings were not greed at all, but rather her legitimate rights.
Rather, what Cassano was trying to do was to deprive her of her rights and limit her love… It could be packaged under the name of bad taste.
Cassano thought this and smiled bitterly.
There were no more words left to say to the hurt woman in front of her.
“Answer me.”
“… “
“Can you love only me… Are there any?”
“… “I’m sorry.”
“Heh, yes.”
Lilia smiled brightly.
Even though my heart is throbbing from the pain of broken heart.
My vision is blurry and I can’t see anything.
Even if she doesn’t want to beat up the man in front of her right now.
Because our hearts collided, because our hearts were communicated.
The apology was just his choice, and the reason he chose the apple was because of his own complaints.
After lightly summarizing all her causes and effects, Lilia smiled brighter and ended the long conversation.
“Then there’s nothing I can do.”
But the pain of broken heart became a dagger and divided.
One on her moaning chest, the other on… To the mean man who chose many loves.
“But that’s a good thing, because you have one child to look after during this boring time.”
It would be better if you only looked at me.
Charles, if she had turned her eyes away from the child, she would have been able to compromise somehow.
Lilia, who had chosen to shift her wounds to the presence of others, realized her mistake and closed her mouth, but her grumbling had already become a dagger and cut deep into Cassano’s heart.
‘Of course, because it was disappointing.’
I don’t have anything to say, so I keep my mouth shut. A man can do that.
But that wasn’t the answer Lilia wanted.
At the very least, I’ll at least give you an excuse to ease any doubts.
I did it because I was drawn to it, I can’t give up on you even now, I’m sorry for being stubborn.
What Lilia wanted to hear was that even though she was embroidered in the sky, she became the Milky Way with no end in sight, and she was enough to disturb the night sky.
However, Lilia was unable to relieve the suspicion she had once felt because of his steadfast appearance.
Maybe I just chose it as a substitute to relieve the boredom of this shitty frontline life.
‘Okay, if it’s a substitute, there’s no need to bring it with you, right?’
I don’t know Cassano’s inner thoughts, but the pathetic self-loathing that I can do because I don’t know.
Lilia spoke to Cassano in a slightly subdued voice.
“You can leave the northern front if you want, I will tell Oberon.”
“… “I can’t do that.”
“Why? Aren’t I uncomfortably like this? It’s okay if you don’t hesitate.”
Lilia organizes her emotions as she pleases and pretends to be carefree with a completely unhappy heart.
Why don’t you talk more, why don’t you reveal more, and why do you run away like that? If all we had left was time, we would have enough time to face each other more.
Cassano gritted his teeth as he looked at the frustrated Lilia, growled in an irritated voice, and ruffled her hair.
“… To be honest! Yeah, the relationship didn’t start out healthy. “I wasn’t honest, and there were a lot of things I deceived – but.”
“… “
“Even though I have never lied to you, Lilia, she has never felt a lie. While we were together, I was drawn to you and thought about you a lot. That… I’m serious.”
“Other women are like that too, right?”
“Ha.”
Rather, Lilia’s face becomes calm, even if she speaks her truth, even if she expresses her love, even if she pours out her heart – Cassano’s sincerity is broken by the words Lilia speaks.
Because the women she questioned also had sincere love.
“I’m not blaming your sincerity or your heart. “I don’t want anything less than the best.”
Lilia playfully spreads the tip of her index finger at the corner of her mouth.
She smiled like a clown and made up her voice as bright as possible.
“If I can’t be the best in you, then our relationship is over, and that’s it.”
A love that cannot be established.
The end of a relationship.
Lilia did not want the size or density of love or any of the trivial modifiers. I just hope for a love that is completely shared in both directions, the only love that Cassano gives.
Since Cassano already has a lot of love to be responsible for, she is not satisfied with her love. It was a simple story, Lilia thought.
Cassano was resigned.
Cheeks stained with tears and lips trembling, unable to control their emotions.
Slightly swollen eyelids, pretty lips crushed by teeth, fists swallowing her anger, and even her throat full of words she couldn’t say.
No matter what she said now, she knew that she couldn’t take back anything about Lilia, so she slowly got up from her seat.
“… “I’m sorry, Lilia.”
“Ugh.”
“But- everything I told you today is sincere. Every little thing I told you… “It was all about my sincerity.”
“I know.”
“Even though I took advantage of you coming to me, I blame myself for not being honest and relying on your actions, for not being able to reveal my feelings and hiding behind your courage… Even if you curse, I completely understand.”
Lilia smiled softly at his thoughtful consideration until the end, saying she understood. Why would she curse at each other? They couldn’t be honest with each other, so they just exchanged emotions by hiding from each other’s actions.
“I never intend to do that. Cassano?”
“… Yes.”
“Tomorrow… Don’t be late and come out.”
We just go back to the beginning.
