Chapter 84 – Episode 84. If You’re Happy Even if It’s a Lie (3)
“…”
“… Is it too difficult to say?”
Celica cautiously asked as if she was concerned about the lengthy silence.
But she still didn’t think to open her mouth.
Even though it was a word that would normally be glossed over in some way.
– Pounding, pounding.
At this moment, the beating of her heart was trying to prevent her from spitting something out of her mouth.
The heat from it shows no signs of being erased even by the coldness of the lake, and it heats up her head to the point of stupefying her mind.
“If you have trouble speaking, you don’t have to.”
To me who was silent and at a loss for what to do, Celica spoke in her caring voice as if admonishing me.
“Well, everyone has something to be ashamed of. I also think of that at night, so I kick the blanket…”
I can’t even tell myself.
Perhaps the words came out while guessing about my identity, but she dismissed the question as if it was okay.
“… Anyway, there may be one or two concerns that I can’t tell everyone. Even if there is such a thing, there is nothing strange about it, isn’t it human life?”
In her mature attitude, where even such generosity was felt, her immature appearance from her first meeting had disappeared.
After that, she taught me that she has grown enormously in just a few months.
Furthermore, based on that attitude, as if it teaches us that we will grow further in the future.
“There are things I can’t tell you either, but you can’t be mean and only ask Dave to confess.”
Yes, she is a warrior.
She was given the mission of defending this world against the demon lord, and was born with the necessary potential.
Everything she has gone through becomes her experience value, and the more difficult the experience, the more accelerated her growth.
Immature is only the first time after all. One day, she will reach a place where she can’t compare to me, who is only a henchman of the demon king’s army, and at the end, she will engage in a bloody battle with the demon king.
And in the process, he will fight with the executives who protect him.
All she wanted to do was to induce her to kill the cadre who, in the process, controlled the forces she believed were the only ones she could be with.
“… Rather than worry.”
To that end, I thought I should use the encounter that started from this coincidence.
At best, it would be impossible for me to get what I want, as I can only manage one person.
In the process, I don’t care how much I trample the body and mind of the person who allowed my heart. I thought it had to be like before, but…
“Rather than worrying, I should say regret.”
What I feel now is the kind of emotion that has no choice but to turn away.
If I were to give it a name, it would be called ‘guilty’.
“… Regret?”
“Because it’s already too late to turn back.”
Of course, the options would have existed.
The first time he raped her, then when he met Verdia and learned that her true identity was her hero.
If I had made an excuse and left at that time, I wouldn’t have been swayed by the same feelings as now.
If it hadn’t been for her greed to draw her into her my revenge… If that was the case, she wouldn’t have given her heart to the other two, including her.
“It’s too late to turn back…”
Realizing that such a piece of her heart had been revealed, she looked at her eyes, but her gaze was still taken away from me and directed to the other side of the sky.
Her eyes were perfectly clear as she looked into the moonlight, but the corners of her mouth were slightly drooped nonetheless.
Uncharacteristic of her who always maintains her bright aura, like she is deep in her thoughts.
“… It’s like me.”
And what led to the end was sympathy for me.
When I turned around, not knowing what those words meant, Celica spread her hands toward the sky and started talking.
“Dave, I am.”
I didn’t mention it myself, but it was a fact that anyone would naturally realize.
“You’ve noticed to some extent, but you’re no ordinary person.”
Yes, anyone can tell that this party is out of the ordinary.
He started off modestly, but now he is a swordsman and a great wizard with skills that exceed that of most adventurers. And even the 10 strongest players on the continent who look after them…
If you gather only the conditions that stand out, anyone will be able to easily infer that her identity is a ‘hero’.
“… Are you in charge of something important?”
She didn’t know that and just said that she was guessing, but Celica nodded her head as if that was enough.
“I have a mission. As soon as growth ends, I have to take responsibility for many people right away… A very, very important role.”
I let out a heavy voice that didn’t answer.
As if she couldn’t stand the feeling of her stuffiness, Celica slowly raised her body floating in the lake.
“But in the end, it’s a decision made by others.”
A smile was painted on her mouth as she looked down at my hand, but what was painted on her eyes was more like a mess.
“Even if I had natural strength, they never asked for my intentions. Not once did they give me a choice, they just told me to go this way.”
On the face reflected in the water in my hand.
As if you couldn’t just ignore the emotions revealed from it, or as if you kept falling into it.
“It’s rewarding and meaningful, but… Because in the end, there was no choice for me in the process.”
“… Celica.”
“Because we resemble each other in that things don’t go our way in the end. Maybe that’s why we are more attracted to each other.”
She squeezed her hand and brushed off the water, then her gaze turned to me.
“Dave.”
Calling my name in such a state.
“Do you like me?”
Celica quietly asked me about my feelings.
I immediately gave the answer to that question.
“… Yes, I like it.”
Obviously the answer she wants.
But just like…
Revealing a little bit of my inner self, which cannot be said to be a lie.
“Yeah, I like Dave too.”
To that answer, Celica responded with a smile.
Maintaining that kind of transparency, revealing my true feelings without hesitation.
“To the extent that, if I were to name the person I have the most heart for in the world, I would say you without hesitation.”
But does she know?
That such a sincere heart is considered too heavy for me.
“But do you know?”
Unlike me, who had no choice but to contain such grievances, she only spoke her true feelings as she approached me.
“In my life, where everything in the world should be considered equal. How special is the meaning of you who came in by accident… How trustworthy you seemed to help me when I was frightened as I had to carry on a mission.”
It was something anyone could do.
Anyone but me Among them, it was just a trick to create a crisis myself and buy her favor.
“Is it too greedy to want someone like that to protect the place I will return to?”
I couldn’t hear more of that, so I reached my hand behind her as she tried to hug me.
“I want you to wait for me to come back alive, who will soon be heading to limb…”
-Fuck!
As soon as her fingers snapped, the power that spread from me seized her mind.
After that, her body leaned forward and leaned against my arms.
That’s right, no matter how mature a hero is, this must be something that can’t be helped.
She has already been consumed by my power, and as long as she does not become hostile to me, her mind will fully accept my power.
Such a useful tool will grow more and more, and depending on how you use it, whether or not you can achieve what you want will be determined.
Eliminate the memories of trampling the body, and induce familiarity toward me from that unconsciousness.
If you consider the camaraderie that arises in the process, the love that goes beyond that, or something beyond that, as a means to an end…
“… Sorry.”
Even if you have to think so.
“Sorry.”
What came out of my mouth that actually took away her self was a mind that was rather a hindrance to my purpose.
The kind of cowardly self-satisfaction that I’m allowed to say only when my voice doesn’t reach her ears.
“If only I had a little more courage…”
A life that has been running away ever since I was left alone.
The people always in front of me were just split in two.
Either an enemy or a person to use.
“I wouldn’t have had to use your mind. You wouldn’t have to hurt the people you care about.”
It was the same for them too.
Why did the girls who should be let go as if they were passing by, felt so different?
I know why.
Because the two people she treasured whispered love to me even though they knew my true self.
Even though I knew the truth of these two people, I was afraid that I would be caught, so I was the age who planned to break up, but even so, I couldn’t erase the thought of wanting to the woman in front of me.
Perhaps.
She thinks she does, too.
Furthermore, I couldn’t get rid of the thought that between them might be where I belong.
“… But it must be too late to turn it back now, right?”
Knowing that even that was nothing but vain greed, I was determined to completely rule out such an option.
I’ve already done it, and I have to
Knowing that she who has a great cause must be the idol of everyone, and I alone should not be given priority…
“Yeah, because there’s nothing left to do but move on.”
As I felt the time of the promise approaching, I quietly kissed the mouth that whispered love for me.
A pure heart without lust or impurity.
Expressing my sincerity, which I would never have done while her memory was still alive.
“So, at least…”
Please, fake moments with me.
“At least until I leave.”
Hoping that it will remain as a happy memory even after I am gone.
***
And, the next morning.
“… Etch!!”
As she was helping to tidy up the tent to get ready to leave, a powerful sneeze erupted from Celica’s mouth.
After that, her runny nose and her shivering body.
“Did you catch a cold?”
When Yumir, who was watching from her side, asked the question curtly, Celica asked her back with excitement in her mind, just in case she wondered.
“Ehehe, are you worried?”
“No, fools don’t catch colds, but I don’t think they do.”
“… No.”
“Coke! Ah, why are you feeling so bad all of a sudden? Is it because I caught a cold that fools don’t get?”
“Ah, is it really going to be like this from morning!?”
Soon after, Celica runs towards Ymir, even arranging the tent. Of course, Ymir didn’t openly respond to her attack, and she just ducked behind her and avoided her.
The action stopped when I was a certain distance from the tent site.
“I wish I had come all the way here.”
“What happened… Town!”
As it is, Yumir puts her hand on my mouth after blocking her mouth with her telekinesis.
Afterwards, when her gaze turned to Dave and Heira, who were still working hard to organize the tent, Celica’s expression gradually hardened as if she noticed something.
Saying that, Ymir looked back at Dave and Heira, who were walking ahead.
As if he noticed something in her gaze, Celica’s expression gradually hardened.
“… Is it about Heira?”
“Oh well, that kid’s condition yesterday wasn’t right. So she couldn’t ask directly, but she had time to make a rough guess.”
Gulp, Serika swallowed her saliva and waited for an answer.
Soon she told Celica what she had guessed, based on what Ymir had heard about her the day before.
“Dave, that guy, looks like he’s planning on leaving this party as soon as the armor sticks come back.”
“…”
