Chapter 185 – Episode 184. Until We Become (2)
That’s how it happened.
So, Asti and Astrid ended up not being two, but one.
‘Astrid… ‘
Asti, who was still looking down at the scene, murmured involuntarily.
I see.
The reason Astrid was allowed only an hour a day.
Even so, the reason why she didn’t have a big complaint.
The very curse that threatened her life, she was handling it alone.
Astrid was handling it alone.
I thought it wasn’t me, but in the end, Astrid, who was me, another me, was facing the curse alone and was enduring it.
I looked up.
Strangely, it seemed as if a haze was rising before her eyes, so Asti raised her head to see the sky without her boiling.
The sky was not visible.
*
Leopold was also watching it.
From the moment Astrid was born until now, I have been watching every moment.
The moment the curse aimed at Astrid was activated and she fell down the stairs, she unknowingly clenched her fists, and her hatred for Astein, who was already living a life better off dead somewhere in the Imperial Research Institute, raged. Burned up
But what is more urgent than that is Asti.
Asti was staring blankly in front of her as if she was lost somewhere.
She watched with absurdly intense concentration as her life passed by like a play.
“This… ?”
Around Asti’s shoulder, something like black smoke was rising rapidly.
First. Don’t try to get involved in your dreams.
Second. Never approach dark spaces that are occasionally seen.
Third. In the event of an emergency, use the prepared items immediately.
Second.
I remembered Berashien’s warning not to approach dark spaces.
But in this case, she is not approaching, but Asti is a dark space she is trying to be herself.
Leopold grabbed Asti by the shoulder and shook him vigorously.
“Asti, Asti! Wake up! Asti!”
However, her gaze did not turn to Leopold.
The unfocused eyes were looking somewhere far away, not Leopold.
Asti stands in front of her, blocking her view and staring blankly somewhere in the distance, as if Leopold, who is somehow trying to get her attention, doesn’t even care about her.
“What… “
Don’t get involved in your dreams.
But what should I do?
Even at this moment, the black smoke that appeared from Asti’s shoulders eventually became a black circle and was swallowing her Asti bit by bit.
Even her pure white silver hair was being invaded by the black circle.
“What should I do… What to do… ?”
At this rate, Asti will be eaten.
She ends up being eaten without being able to get out of her dream.
She is forever trapped in this dream, from which she will never come out again.
She had already called and called again and again until her throat exploded, but Asti did not pay her attention to him.
“I shouldn’t have come… If I knew it would be like this… “
Leopold bit his lip.
The pressed lips turned white, and Leopold couldn’t decide what to do.
He was always sober and sober.
Leopold’s brain, which used to make the most of the conditions given to this situation and derive the best results, hardened as if it had stopped working.
Asti’s gaze was still not looking at Leopold.
“… It’s stupid, I didn’t say anything at all and protected it. What kind of disgrace is this in front of Your Highness?”
A blunt tone was heard.
Astrid von Mitterien.
A broken soul, a soul that holds a curse in that empty place.
She knew
She found out exactly.
I don’t know why the two souls dwelled in one body,
At least now I know of the existence of a curse that gnaws at her soul.
The curse was not lifted, and she knew very well that she was waiting for the day when she would stretch out those filthy tentacles that would destroy her body.
So an hour a day.
One hour a day, the time to be able to handle the body she has lived through so far.
She struggled desperately to suppress the curse, and since she could never extinguish this life, she fought desperately alone and fought again and again.
She was at least far more womanly than she was, and she did not want to let this be known to her, who was more than anyone else in the seat next to Leopold.
So even though it was only an hour a day, she had no complaints.
Of course, there are times when she is dissatisfied with being her human being, and there are times when she blames me for why I became this way.
Still, what she didn’t say was that to this woman who invaded my body —
Whim.
It’s just a minor whim.
It was Astrid who created the karma, and it was Astrid who created the enemy.
I don’t know who it is, but since there are not one or two barbarians who have a grudge against her, she must be one of them, so she is not guilty of this woman.
It was the weight of karma that Astrid had to bear, so she didn’t want to burden her.
Besides, she wasn’t weak enough to defeat her curse.
When she finally succeeded in suppressing the curse to some extent, she was finally able to talk to the woman who occupied her body.
I could see the world through her eyes.
I was able to communicate with Leopold through her voice.
Even though it was going a little differently than she intended, anyway.
And it was only then that she realized that she could only move her body for an hour a day, but anyway.
“I knew to some extent, but I didn’t know that she was originally a person. Wouldn’t it be unbelievable unless you see it yourself that your soul is split because of a curse?”
“That too.”
In the space of her dreams, Asti, who forced Asti up and put her to sleep, was floating on her body.
I tried not to change her body because I was afraid that the curse I had been struggling with might have a bad effect on the child, but even in an emergency like this, it was impossible.
“Besides, it’s really strange that you were involved in such a mysterious thing… “
“I mean. Anyway, Asti was well taken care of by me. I think she can go back now, but how is it?”
“Yeah, that will work. But… “
Leopold’s blue eyes turned to Astrid.
One question remains unanswered.
Leopold wanted to answer that question.
“… What were you going to do Astrid.”
“What are you talking about? What do you do?”
“Astrid.”
Leopold’s hand gripped Astrid’s wrist.
In this place where no one can interfere, Leopold held Astrid’s wrist and peered into her face.
“Did you mean to live your whole life carrying that curse?”
“… It’s my job, Your Highness. It’s a curse given as karma for my actions, so shouldn’t I bear it myself?”
Astrid’s mint-colored eyes looked up at Leopold.
There was no hesitation, and determined eyes were looking at Leopold.
“I am a soldier of the Empire. Do you know how many lives were cut off with this hand? If I don’t take my grudge against me, who will?”
“However, it is.”
Aren’t you too harsh
Leopold was speechless.
“… And, rather than me… Astiga, tell Your Highness a little more… More, more suitable… “
Astrid was speechless.
I didn’t know.
Because I didn’t know.
It was because I didn’t know.
Since he grew up, he has been running around the battlefield.
There are more human heads cut off than the number of bread eaten.
There was no way she knew how to reveal her feelings to the man she fell in love with.
I didn’t know how to speak honestly
I don’t know how to say I adore you,
They don’t even know what a feminine look is and how to show it.
I do not know.
I do not know.
It is full of unknowns.
She is like that
That’s Astrid.
Would such a girl suit Leopold?
It wasn’t.
Rather, Astiga, that bright and splendid Asti, suited Leopold far more than she did.
She was satisfied with her present condition, which was much longer than an hour, even if it was only for a few hours a day, while holding back the curse.
It was good to be by Leopold’s side.
So she chose coexistence.
She too was a woman, and she still had a girlish heart.
Who knows Astrid’s feelings of having to hand the side of the man she loves to someone who, although they used to be one, is now divided.
Who knows the bitterness, the sadness, the time she had to cry inaudibly.
So she suggested coexistence.
I thought it was okay as it is.
Astrid thought and thought and persuaded herself, with a lump of curse trampled under her feet —
Yes, she made up her mind.
Because coexistence is good, because it is good to be subordinated.
May Asti stay by Leopold’s side.
Give up on returning to the original world.
Stay that way, even for just a few hours a day—
She hoped that Astrid would also be able to taste her warmth.
So suggested.
I will help you return to the original world.
Instead, she told him to go back after marrying Leopold.
Leopold will surely win Asti’s heart if he buys time like that.
Because he is such a man
Astrid suggested that to Asti.
Trampling on the throbbing and pulsating mass of curses,
Say shut up,
Telling you to be quiet
Saying that you are my business, so show your teeth only to me.
“Unlike… What could have been… “
Astrid cried.
Astrid cried, shedding clear, transparent tears.
