Chapter 316 – Volume 64 – I Don’t Want You to Be Happy (1)
“Rika, what kind of person do you want to become in the future?”
“I am a hero! Like the hero in the story my brother told me, I want to save the world!”
Dim and blurry vision.
It’s my body, but it doesn’t feel like I’m moving.
The feeling of happiness that comes with a lively smile.
It was so bad that I felt like I was going to get nauseous.
“But it doesn’t mean you want to become a hero, does it?”
“You are chosen. But, you said that! Even if you are not chosen as a hero, you can become a hero.”
“Well, it was like that.”
When I was young, there were stories my older brother used to tell me.
This is not a story I heard somewhere, but a story my brother made just for me.
And the story I liked the most was a rather unusual one.
Ever since I was young, I admired heroes and wanted to become one.
The story of a girl who was not chosen to be a warrior.
However, this is a story about a girl becoming a proper hero.
“I’m in a really bad mood this morning. It’s a dream from when I was young.”
I wonder if it was because I fell asleep while watching a cartoon yesterday.
I felt that my eyes were a little sore and uncomfortable.
The problem may be that I cried out of unnecessary emotion.
“…Brother.”
I remember how good Rosaria and I seemed to get along the last time we met.
It’s not a face that always looks unhappy and distressed.
It looked very happy and comfortable.
When I was very young, my older brother would smile while telling me stories and putting me to sleep.
The way he showed it when he and I were passing by or when the three of us, including Rosaria, went out to play together.
I was really regaining that vitality.
“Why.”
I bite my lip without realizing it.
Between the lightly torn wounds, I can feel the fishy taste.
The feeling of resentment seemed to be constricting my breathing.
“I can’t give you anything other than hurt.”
It’s truly a disgusting, unmatched jealousy.
A selfish woman like me doesn’t deserve that.
You probably know best yourself.
After my brother became distant from me and started focusing on swordsmanship.
Because so much has changed inside me.
To be honest, even I couldn’t understand or understand myself.
“I’m glad that my brother can be happy. But…”
Sometimes I wish you weren’t happy.
To see someone happy in the arms of someone other than myself.
Because it is a very painful thing.
Every time you look at me, the painful and sad look in your eyes passes by.
Because I compare myself so much that I can’t help but feel that way all the time.
I guess that’s what I think.
“Whoa…”
I slowly glared at the comic book in my hand, the culprit that had been shaking my heart recently.
Hope is like a very sweet poison.
It disturbs people so much and makes them happy but also painful.
“Did you say Siu?”
The person who drew this cartoon.
Lee, who created the genre of comics and is at the same time a master of that genre.
The person who created the Hwashin series, which is now my favorite comic series.
These are strangely familiar stories.
Of course, these are not stories I know at all, but the plot and character closely follow the writing style of someone I know.
That’s why I can’t help but love these works.
‘Ha…’
When I was young, the stories my loved ones told me.
It allows me to recall once again the stories that I can no longer hear.
Also, a story that moves us forward.
“I think that’s good. “The important thing is to do what you really want to do.”
“What I really want to do…”
Staring intently at the lines written in the comic book.
I sighed slowly.
What on earth do I want to do?
“…”
It’s such a difficult problem.
Somewhere in my heart, I want to express my feelings honestly and feel at ease.
But in another corner, neither my brother nor I can forgive.
I felt so lonely and wanted to be with my brother.
I hate my older brother who ignored me and focused on swordsmanship.
I can never forgive you.
Because I don’t know how to think of anything but such selfish thoughts.
In the end, I hate myself for being the one who always hurt my brother.
I don’t have the right to be a jerk to my brother.
In the end, the two different concerns converge into one conclusion.
Do nothing and maintain the status quo.
It leads me to a very lonely ending.
“Rika.”
“…!? Yes, father.”
It was a time when I was lying in bed like that, lost in thought.
When I heard my father’s voice calling me, I was startled and opened the door.
“What a surprise. You overslept.”
“S-sorry.”
“No, I don’t mean to reprimand you. I have a story to tell.”
“…A story?”
“Hmm? That book…”
My father came into the room and looked at the comic book on my bed.
He started asking strange questions.
“If this were to be, it should be in the study. Why are you looking at it separately after purchasing it?”
“Well, that’s…”
“…Now that I think about it, it’s filled with things I couldn’t see while I was away.”
Because my father forbade it, I couldn’t buy computers or smartphones.
I was looking for a copy of the book that was published later.
My father seems a little dissatisfied with that.
“Anyway, since my father also has time to see it… I wanted to see it right away, so I started buying it.”
“You must have liked these cartoons so much that you couldn’t wait for me to watch them.”
“Yes?”
“It’s still the same, I like that guy’s story.”
“…?”
It looks like he was muttering to himself as things went by.
For some reason, that one word strangely stuck in my ears.
By ‘that guy’, are you talking about the artist Siwoo?
But no matter how much I thought about the words before that, it was annoying.
Still, it was only in the last few years that artist Siwoo appeared.
It was quite recent to say that it was still the same.
‘…Wait a minute, my father doesn’t usually watch cartoons. ‘You were collecting all of Siu’s works.’
Of course, it’s not like my father didn’t have any knowledge of art.
That’s what I thought it meant, but I found it odd that they only stuck to one artist’s comics.
Even I have recently been purchasing some comics from other artists.
Even most of the copies of paintings my father exhibited were by artist Siwoo.
Before Siwoohwa, such cases did not exist often.
Most of the time, I just got things from painters who I thought were famous…
When his brother started drawing and.
The timing when artist Siwoo began to appear is strangely coincidental.
The difficult father even acknowledged his older brother as a wizard or a painter.
‘…!’
However, this is a situation that is only inferred through assumptions.
If what I’m thinking right now is correct, it also explains the feelings I felt every time I looked at Siwoo’s cartoons.
Except that it is not a general idea, everything seems to fit together.
“Hmm, yes. I guess it’s something that can’t be helped. Starting next month, I’ll be calling you for work, so just know that.”
“Yes, father.”
Although my father was talking about some kind of schedule.
My head was already full of things about my brother and painter Siu, so I couldn’t hear it properly.
Well, if it’s a schedule, I’ll let you know later.
“…”
I checked various information again to see if my thoughts were correct.
Assuming that my father knew about this, I started looking for evidence in the house.
If my father had found out about this fact, there would have been data like that.
‘I need to be sure.’
Artist Siu’s comics were, for me, the only way to fill the void left by his older brother.
Thanks to that, I realized the possibility of being happy even if I wasn’t by my brother’s side.
Through it all, he had hope and, to some extent, even considered giving up on his brother.
‘But, if Siwoo’s artist really is my brother…’
That hope was as good as a lie.
Because in the end, I can’t be happy unless I’m by my brother’s side.
If you remain stubborn like you are now, wishing your brother happiness will become meaningless.
“I’m sure it was organized here.”
I’ve never thought of stealing something like this before…
I knew roughly where my father kept those documents.
Since I don’t usually pay attention to such things, they kept it without any special security measures.
“Oh, here it is.”
Of course, it cannot be said that it happened recently, because it has already been several years.
To find relevant data, you would have to go back in time to some extent.
Because of that, I couldn’t simply find related content.
“Yes…”
I was annoyed because my extremely long hair got in the way of my work.
It was difficult to comfortably organize my hair in the position where I was checking this.
It was very annoying because of that.
Because my father told me that I should never cut it.
This long hair that hasn’t been cut even once since childhood,
I think today is the first time it bothers me this much.
Since it is always something that naturally belongs to me, I thought it was okay to be a little uncomfortable.
But maybe it’s because I’m so anxious right now.
Just today, I felt envious of other people with short hair.
“Huh? This is…”
Although it seems a little different from what I was looking for.
For some reason, I paused because there was a document mentioning my brother and I.
Perhaps it involves managing our reputation or something.
In fact, it felt like they were processing and organizing rumors about us at the top of the document.
That’s probably true.
While thinking about that, I looked at the document and was taken aback by the unexpected content.
“What’s this…?”
Prevent the revelation that there is an adopted child who was adopted and raised by the Gladys family?
Do you want to take action afterward to prevent this rumor from spreading by opening up bigger issues related to other hostile departments?
What does this mean?
